Office Romance
By
Sanjay Gora
Ritu had never felt so attracted to any man in her life before, as she was this time. Now she knew what love at first sight really meant. Sumit had joined the firm only two months back as the COO. Ritu’s boss Seema who reported to COO had introduced them. It was very rare for Ritu to be caught searching for words but that is what exactly happened to her in that introductory meeting. Seema later made fun of her. How could she tell Seema that her mind and lips had gone numb the moment she saw Sumit. He was not a great looker, but his deep eyes, his broad chin, his inviting lips and the overall personality had Ritu in daze from the moment she set eyes on him.
Coming to office no longer remained a chore from then on. It was a pleasure. Her cubicle was right opposite his cabin. So she could steal glances at him as and when he passed by. Gradually it was becoming addictive. There were times when she had to suddenly look away lest she is caught admiring him. Seema seemed to have a hint of Ritu’s infatuation but she did not bring it up.
The more Ritu tried to pull her mind away from him, the more she got attracted to him.
One day she got so engrossed in her thoughts of him that she had a mental simulation of Sumit taking her in his arms and passionately kissing her in his cabin. Ritu came back to reality when Seema almost screamed for the third time, “Ritu, are you okay? You are sweating profusely and your face is all red.” Ritu opened her eyes with a jerk and managed to smile and say, “ Oh, I am alright, Delhi humidity, you know.” But Seema’s eyes told the whole story. She had caught Ritu fantasizing and she knew it. Well, nothing could be done about it, so Ritu let it be.
Day by day, she was getting more and more dreamy. One Monday morning, she was called by Sumit for some presentation, as Seema was on leave. Ritu cursed herself for not wearing her lucky suit that day. She knocked and entered but almost turned back when she saw Sumit taking off his blazer. Sumit saw her and said, “Please come. You must be Ritu, we met the first day.”
Ritu felt like a child going to principal’s office. Here she was thinking how Sumit might have noticed her attraction and the way she admired him. This guy could barely put her name and face together. Anyway that was her problem. She mumbled, “The presentation” and took out the pen drive from her pocket. Sumit indicated by wave of his hand that she could upload on his PC, which was placed to his right. Ritu had to cross him from behind and sit on the side stool, with Sumit a few inches away on his chair. Was her dream coming true? Will Sumit make love to her right here, right now? She pulled her mind away from these idiotic thoughts. The CPU was below the table, so she was making effort to insert the pen drive. Sumit saw her struggling and said, “Let me help you.” And then the unthinkable happened. She was trying to get up to make space for him. Simultaneously he was trying to take his hand down so that he could insert the pen drive without making her get up. This led to his arm brushing against her body in a swift downward movement. She was shaken to the core. Sumit was feeling embarrassed about all this, and she could not say that she was not sorry. After a few awkward sentences, they started working on the presentation and Ritu felt like a thirsty fish in the water. The moment presentation was over, she rushed to the washroom and put cold water on her face, neck and arms. “How can I be so cheap? This is lust, not love. There are better looking men all around. What is happening to me?” she thought.
After that episode, she felt in better control of herself for 2-3 days. But the madness returned after the 4th day, refined madness, so to say. Having overcome the lust phase, she had graduated to the love phase. She could not justify or explain her feelings to herself, but then isn’t that love?
She could not go on like this forever. She had to come out of this phase or confess her feelings to Sumit. Easier said than done. What will she say, “I fell in love with you the moment I saw you. I fantasize about you. I don’t know anything about you other than the official profile. You know even less about me. We have met only a few times in last couple of weeks. Still I am madly, badly in love with you.” He will laugh it off.
But then Ritu needed to do something about the situation. She brooded over it for a few days. Finally she decided to make Seema her confidant. Ritu went to her cabin and asked to discuss some personal matter. Seema gave a meaningful smile as if she knew things. Ritu narrated her trauma over last few days. Seema listened to her stoically. Ritu even noticed some envy and sarcasm in her eyes, but then she could be wrong, she thought. After she was finished, she asked, “So Seema, what do you say. What should I do?”
“You can give it some more time to make up your mind, or you can raise the issue with Sumit and close the issue either way for good”, said Seema.
“What will you do, if you were me?”, asked Ritu.
“I can never be you. I mean why should I even think about it, when we are not allowed to have such affairs with colleagues here.”
“But that applies to me also. How can I be so foolish and so out of control?”
“You speak to Sumit. Maybe he can make things clear and better.”
Ritu thanked Seema for her time and came out more confused. She had not even thought about the office rules. This job was important to her. So were her feelings for Sumit.
She decided to delay the things for some days.
Lately, Sumit had started giving her smiles and nods as he passed by her seat. This was nothing special. He did it with many others. But to Ritu it meant positive signals. Maybe her love vibes had made him feel the connection.
In the meanwhile Seema was keeping herself away from Ritu after that long conversation they had. “Judgemental bitch”, thought Ritu, “You can’t make plans and strategies before you fall in love with somebody. You don’t check office rules to see if loving is allowed or not. And how come office has this power to decide what we do with our personal lives. Some bully like Seema must have made these silly rules.” Ritu was now repenting that she shared her personal life with her boss.
As luck would have it, Seema went on leave for a week. That gave Ritu the chance to be closer to Sumit. Her admiration of him as a person grew manifold, and that made her more attracted towards him. They started sharing jokes and having fun together. She felt like she had found a long lost friend. These were the happiest 7 days of her life in recent memory.
Seema joined back and Ritu felt restrained. She missed those 7 days of fun and shared laughter. She started finding excuses to go to his room. She started sharing jokes with him on whatsapp. He also responded positively. Gradually she started getting bolder and confident. Ritu could sense affection for her in Sumit’s eyes. She decided to take the risk and ask the dreaded question. But she was afraid to ask in person. She thought over it a lot and sent a whatsapp message, which said
“Sumit, I love you. I want to spend my whole life with you. I know you love me too, I can feel it. Let us be together forever. Waiting for your Yes. Lots of love.”
She sent it and soon after she realized what she had done. She had put her job, her reputation at risk with one simple message. Sumit could fire her for this. He must be laughing at her childishness. He will share this with other men in office. She will become a butt of jokes, if she gets to keep her job. Either way, she was screwed. Ritu pushed her negative thoughts away and checked to see if he had seen the message. The double blue ticks confirmed he had. She started praying for a positive reply. She waited, waited and waited. One day passed, two days passed but nothing. He did not send any jokes also. This was not like him. “So he does not love me, so he is taking his time to snub me. Or maybe he does and wants to think over it before he accepts”, Ritu kept on repeating this in her mind for two days.
She convinced herself that it was over. Sumit had seen it, laughed at it and knowing the office rules, forgave her. He did not love her but being nice he did not create any controversy. He chose to ignore it. Both were able to avoid each other for two days. But one corner of her heart was still expecting a yes.
She willed herself to not check her phone to see if he had replied. It had been about three days now. She hated that she was constantly checking his 'last seen at' status and yes, he had logged in just five minutes ago. Yet she couldn't stop herself. This sinking feeling to find absolutely no communication from him was becoming unbearable, almost torturous.
And then, just as she sat down in her chair, her phone vibrated. With her heart thudding in her ear, she unlocked her phone and stared at the screen. Finally! It was his message.
But when she opened it and read it, she nearly stopped breathing. She didn't know if he was joking or not. What was this?
His message read
“So you really don’t know anything about my relation with Seema. I thought you two were close. Seema told me you had something interesting to say to me but kept it a secret. Now I know why she was laughing while telling this.”
