Lechery
The family court room was packed to the brim. There were ten cases to be heard that day. On one side, Nilotpal was trying desperately to save his marriage, but Nilima remained unmoved. She kept repeating one thing: "I want a divorce." Nilotpal pleaded with her repeatedly, invoking their two daughters, asking her not to divorce him. He promised to give her whatever freedom she desired. He felt as though the very ground of their relationship was turning barren. It seemed as though hundreds of thorny vines were rising from the soil, and their piercing stings wanted to destroy his very existence. To Nilima, their relationship had become impotent, one with no hope of continuing their lineage. She felt no warmth from such a powerless relationship. She thought that carrying the weight of such a relationship on her shoulders would only cause pain and suffering—her heart, back, and shoulders would be left bleeding. It seemed better to throw off the thorny chains of this relationship and let her free spirit soar in the vast, open sky. The younger daughter sided with her mother, but the elder daughter had developed a strong aversion to her mother.
She kept trying to forget that scene, but the incident would resurface with even more intensity, almost like a reel of a movie playing before her eyes. Her elder daughter, Juhi, had overheard hushed conversations about her mother and Sharma ji in the neighbourhood, college, and even in the park. Juhi, studying in her final year of M.A., understood everything. The topic of her own marriage often came up in passing conversations. A couple of times, proposals had even come to their house, but her father had not been impressed, so the match did not happen. Generally, Juhi would return home only after 3 PM from college, and Ruhi, the younger one, would often be out until evening. Whenever Juhi told her mother for Ruhi, she must come on time at home, her mother would scold her. Her mother said that you Juhi have become just like your father—no social interactions, and now you wanted to make Ruhi like you too. Several times, Juhi had received scolding from her mother for this very reason.
There was no class at college today, so Juhi decided to head home. It was around noon, maybe 12:00 or 12:30. As she reached home and was about to ring the bell, she felt the door was already open. Quietly, she pushed it open and walked inside, heading toward her mother's room to let her know she had returned early because there were no classes. The curtain in her mother’s bedroom was slightly drawn. As soon as Juhi moved it aside, she froze in shock. The sight made her feel dizzy, and she quickly ran to her own room, locking the door behind her. She started crying.
Her mind was consumed with a whirlwind of thoughts, like hundreds of serpents wrapping around her body and soul, dragging her toward a dark abyss, their forked tongues licking at her. The image of sharp, venomous teeth—one set belonging to her mother and the other to Sharma uncle—seemed to seep into her mind. The entire family would be venomed due to such relation. The unseen bodies of their relationship were being pierced by these fangs, and in moments, the family bond seemed to turn lifeless, the breath of their connection slowing down.
Her thoughts were in turmoil, and her head seemed like it was about to explode. She collapsed on the bed, still sobbing. Outside, her mother was knocking at her door, yelling at her for not knocking before entering her bedroom. Juhi didn’t open the door. After a while, Nilima gave up and walked away, but she was anxious. She knew the truth would come out. Juhi had seen them—her mother and Sharma uncle—together in a way no daughter should. What should she do now? Nilima felt trapped. Her daughter had become like her father, standing in the way of her freedom. Had Juhi opened the door, Nilima would have taken drastic steps to stop the situation from spreading, but Juhi hadn’t opened it.
As the evening set in, and the streetlights flickered outside, Juhi heard her father's voice. She thought about telling him everything, but how could she? How could she explain what she had seen? How could she speak to her father about the scene with Sharma uncle and her mother? She now hated her mother with all her heart. Slowly, Juhi emerged from her room and, without saying a word, went to her father. She clung to him and sobbed. Nilima, witnessing this, was a little shaken but quickly composed herself, trying to remain calm. “What new trouble have you caused now?” she asked, “You’ve been hiding in your room all afternoon, not opening the door.” Juhi couldn’t respond, only sobbing as she clung to her father’s chest.
Nilotpal couldn’t comprehend what was happening, but he kept patting his daughter’s head for comfort. After a while, Juhi composed herself, washed her face, and brought a glass of water for her father. She even made tea and served it to him with great care. It was around 7:30 PM when they heard the sound of a car stopping outside. Juhi noticed a boy dropping Ruhi off at home and, before leaving, the boy kissed Ruhi on the cheek. This sight filled Juhi with anger. First, her mother, and now Ruhi—she couldn’t hold her frustration in anymore. She shouted, "What is this behaviour? Coming home so late, and who was that boy?"
Ruhi, looking at her mother, shouted back, “What rubbish! You’ve got trash in your brain. He’s my friend, Rohit—understand?" Then, turning toward Juhi, she added, “Ask my grandmother if you want to know more,” and stormed off to her room, stomping her feet.
Nilotpal, seeing Ruhi’s late return and the way she was speaking to Juhi, felt frustrated. He shouted angrily, "Ruhi, what’s wrong with you? Where are your manners?"
Ruhi, with equal force, yelled back, "Dad, don’t interfere in my personal life. I’m a fully mature girl, and one more thing, I’m an adult now."
With that, Ruhi marched up to her room, leaving Nilotpal in a state of utter disbelief. He wondered, what sin have I committed to deserve this? What is happening today? He realized that the burning passion of the body was tainting the fragrance of relationships. The fire of physical desire was not binding the relationships together but instead burning them to ashes. He thought, not only has the mother gone astray, now even the daughter is walking down a different path.
How could he handle all of this? How could he deal with these changes? Nilima had managed to make Ruhi just like her. A new part of Nilotpal, the man inside, awakened today, and his calm nature erupted in rebellion. He shouted aloud, “Nilima!”
Neelima also replied in a fit of anger, "I'm not deaf, I hear everything. Tell me, what do you want to say?"
"You've given Ruhi so much freedom that today she would..."
"If her father is from the Stone Age, what can anyone do? And why are you shouting at me? She's trying to live her life in her own way, what's wrong with that? These days, if a girl doesn't have two or three boyfriends, what’s left of her social status?"
She thought to herself, "Before Juhi spills the beans, I might as well tell Nilotpal myself. The opportunity is here." Then she said, "Yes, go on, why are you silent now? Sharmaji is right; you're totally outdated. Remember that day, Sharmaji held my hand and helped me cross the road. Your eyebrows went up in surprise and anger. You can’t even do something yourself, and if someone else helps, you make accusations."
"Thank goodness for Sharmaji, who befriended me."
Nilotpal said, "Why did you stop? Speak up!"
"Yes, yes, why should I be scared? Sharmaji is my friend, and I have a relationship with him."
It was as if Nilotpal had been stung by a snake, but the conversation wasn’t over. She continued, "and Mr. Outdated, aka Nilotpal Basu, I can't live with you anymore. I want a divorce. I want to live my life the way I want. I can't live like this, suffocating."
Now, the ground slipped from under Nilotpal’s feet. The truth that had been hidden until now, buried deep, had finally surfaced. Despite all his efforts to satisfy Neelima in every way, he could only provide her with what he could afford from his modest job. But none of that ever seemed enough for her. Slowly, for reasons unknown to him, Neelima had begun to gravitate toward Sharmaji, a man from their colony. One day, unexpectedly, she crossed a line with Sharma, doing something that was widely considered forbidden by society.
Rumours spread quickly, as they always do. They reached Nilotpal’s ears, but like a wounded bird, he couldn’t even flutter his wings. He stayed silent. He kept a distance, which Neelima took advantage of. Deep down, Nilotpal already knew about the relationship between Sharma and Neelima. There had been arguments about it before, but each time, Nilotpal was forced to remain silent. He thought about the young girls in the house and what impact this might have on them. He kept quiet, thinking it would be better that way.
But today, Neelima openly spoke about her relationship with Sharma in front of the girls and demanded a divorce. Juhi felt a surge of anger and almost wanted to strangle her mother, but she remained silent. Neelima filed for divorce the very next day at the family court. Ruhi thought she would now be free to live with her mother and enjoy herself, but things took an unexpected turn.
During the court hearing, Neelima’s lawyer made a statement that stunned everyone: "My client does not wish to take any child with her, nor does she want any alimony. She only seeks a divorce, and sufficient evidence has been presented to the honourable court."
It was clear from the lawyer's words that the reflection of their relationship had shattered. Now, the faces of both were different, separated. Ruhi, who had hoped to stay with her mother, was shaken. She had expected her mother to take her with her, as both of them wanted the freedom. But now, her mother was saying she wouldn’t take her along. Ruhi couldn’t understand why her mother would do that.
Meanwhile, oblivious to Ruhi’s thoughts, the judge began to pronounce the verdict.
After the negotiations between both parties failed, the court accepted the divorce between Neelima and Nilotpal and granted them the right to live separately as they wished. As for their two daughters, Juhi and Ruhi, they would stay under their father's custody, as Neelima had refused to take any of the children with her. The court then asked the two girls if they wanted to stay with their father or be sent to a women’s shelter.
Juhi listened carefully to the judge's words and immediately replied without hesitation, "Judge Sahib, I have always stayed with my father. I want to stay with him."
Ruhi, however, now faced two options: to live with her father according to his rules or go to the women’s shelter. She was confused and unsure about what to do. Just then, the judge called again, "Ruhi, what is your decision? Do you want to go with your father, or should we send you to the women’s shelter?"
Ruhi was startled. Her reverie was broken. In front of her stood her father, who seemed so helpless, and her mother, standing with a selfish smile. For the first time, Ruhi found her mother unappealing. But she didn't know what to do. After a long pause, Ruhi finally said, "Papa."
The court's decision was made. Today, Neelima was like a free bird in the open sky, unburdened by children or the ties of marriage. With a victorious smile, she left the court without looking back at Nilotpal or her daughters. She went straight to a hotel and booked a room for herself. Later that night, she called Sharma to the hotel. Sharma stayed until around 10 PM before leaving. Neelima then rented a one-room flat. For a few months, Sharma paid the rent, but eventually, he began to feel that she wasn’t interested in working. One day, he told Neelima:
"Look, Neelima, you need to do some work. How long will this go on like this?" Sharma said, his tone hinting at concern.
Neelima replied, "No, darling, this is how it will go. And by the way, when are you going to marry me? How long will I live like this?"
Sharma sighed, his expression turning serious. "Neelima, you know I'm a married man, I have a family. How can our marriage happen?"
"What rubbish! Why can’t it happen? You divorce your wife and marry me," Neelima shot back, her voice sharp.
Hearing this, Sharma felt a flash of anger, but he quickly controlled it and replied calmly, "Look, Neelima, life works on practicality. A person’s family is extremely important; without it, they're nothing. Yes, sometimes relationships within a family may loosen, or a man may grow bored and look for peace elsewhere, but that doesn’t mean he can abandon his family."
"Well, I left my family for you. What about that?" Neelima shot back; her voice tinged with bitterness.
"Look, Neelima, I don’t know what happened between you and your husband that caused you to separate, but the decision to part ways was yours. I never asked you to do that," Sharma replied, his tone more measured now.
With those words, he left Neelima’s flat. For Neelima, it was like a bolt from the blue. Her world came crashing down. She felt lost and overwhelmed. As if the sky itself had fallen upon her. Confused and desperate, she quickly made up her mind. "All men are the same, nothing but traders of flesh and beauty. That Sharma, surely someone else, younger and more beautiful, has caught his attention. I will make him pay."
That night, she couldn't sleep. She tossed and turned, thoughts racing through her mind. What was she going to do now? Sharma wouldn't pay the rent anymore—where would she get the money? By morning, she had packed her essentials and set off down an unknown path, searching for peace within herself. She ended up in Rishikesh, hoping to find solace among the sannyasis and saints there.
But she soon realized that even among them, the men were just as hungry for the body as the ones she had left behind. No matter where she went, the desire to exploit her was ever-present. Her hatred for men grew stronger. After some time, she left Rishikesh and travelled to Gangotri, hoping to find inner peace. But peace eluded her there as well.
Her journey continued, aimless and wandering, until she eventually returned to the banks of the Ganges in Varanasi. There, she found solace in an old age home, where she stayed, living off the little food she was given. By now, she was well past fifty, and the years had worn her down.
It’s often said that karma is unpredictable, and that’s how Neelima found herself—adrift, a victim of her own choices, with no sense of direction, no peace, and no answers.
A stone flows through the gutter, and another stone becomes Lord Shankar. Neelima sat quietly in the old age home, lost in thought.
Today, it was announced that a woman from a wealthy family would be coming to serve food at the ashram. The thought of something different from the usual Dalia and khichdi made her mouth water. The elderly women and others in the ashram blessed her with their hearts, excited for the change. And then she arrived.
She sat everyone down in a line and began serving food with her own hands. As she moved from one person to the next, her pace suddenly slowed as she stopped in front of Neelima. Yes, it was her own mother. For a moment, Neelima's heart surged, and she wanted to embrace her, but just as quickly, her mother's past deeds flashed before her eyes. The anger within her started to flare up.
Then, a voice broke her trance: "Beta, give me some too." It was Neelima's own voice. Perhaps her mother had recognized her. When there was no response, she stood up, about to leave without taking any food.
At that moment, Juhi spoke up, "Leaving without eating after being served would be disrespecting the food, which is like disrespecting almighty. Take the food," Juhi placed a plate of food for her, and Neelima ate as if she hadn’t eaten in years, holding the plate tightly, as though someone might snatch it away.
Once she finished serving everyone, she silently left the room. It felt as though the hunger of the stomach was even stronger than the fire within the body. This hunger, this fire, devours everything in its path—whether it’s the hunger of the body or of the soul. And Neelima, still lost in her own thoughts, continued to focus on the food before her.
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