Is Your Partner Lying
No one will ever like to see his / her partner or friend lying . But sometimes some people lie due to many reasons - to hide some of his/ her guilt , to please or even help someone , to show their so-called oversmartness , to deliberately taunt or hurt you , convince you or make you believe some fake things etc. Some people are habitual liars, some are occasionally liars .
There are different types of liars -
1 . Pathological Liars - Pathological lying is a chronic characteristic habitual or compulsive lying habit . It’s usually meant to cheat someone for some reason or no obvious or random reason by making false statements.They may be even unaware of the motive of lying. They can harm themselves or others unknowingly and without any wish to better themselves . Counseling can make them better understand how their lies are going to affect others negatively .
They can be recognised by their acts like -
1 . Exaggerating to make themselves believable .
2 . Live in a fake sense of reality
3 . They keep on their statements modifying .
4 . they become defensive if challenged .
5. They have no regard for truth and honesty .
6. They don’t admit their stories to be untrue .
7 . Claiming someone else's story / success to be their own .
8 . The way they act is not their natural behavior .
9 . They try to pose to be confident .
10 . Everything is about themselves . They want to draw your attention .
11 . They repeat their lies so many times that they often start to feel true .
They often live in self created fantasy world in which their so called truth becomes reality
Simple example - Pathological liars create a fake history saying they achieved something extraordinary even though they haven’t done so . They might try to impress or gain sympathy by claiming his fake serious illness
Prolific Liars - They are frequent liars but they might not feel the same risk or distress as the pathological liars can. Some of their typical characteristics are -
1 . Selfishness - They want to gain sympathy or help in such a situation which they don’t deserve.
2 . Guilt and Compensation - They may feel guilty of their deeds and compensate or even overcompensate ( by doing some good ) to the people they lie to .
3 . Fear - They are usually not confident and are afraid of being caught .
4 . High fliers - They may be good achievers in some aspects of life.
5 . Stressful - They may be under stress due to their lies .
Identifications - Prolific liars may be identified by -
i) Looking for inconsistent or random stories which are seemingly self contradictory .
ii) Shaky behavior - While speaking lies look for change in their behavior like nervousness or
The pathetic liar- Pathetic liar describes a person who uses incompetent , foolish , complicated , unrealistic or unbelievable attempts to pass off being true . This lie may arouse some sympathy . Such liars want to be liked and create deception and have their coworkers like them . These liars normally go along with groupthink . They rarely tender their own opinion or leadership . They change their minds quite often. Rarely their lies might be dangerous .
The sociopathic liar
Sociopathic liars - They are the most disturbing and damaging type of liars. THey usually lie on a routine basis without any reason and without conscience . They don’t bother with any social norms . They lack respect for truth . For their personal gains they will lie using you as a tool without any remorse .
Liars are also categorized as -
1 . White liars - They lie and speak untruth to protect other’s feelings e.g. a boy is not doing well in school but lies to his parents not to worry as he is doing well .
2 . Occasional Liars - They occasionally lie to make themselves look good or to get their desires / demands fulfilled .They do least damage and might be acceptable sometimes . e. g. His friend’s wife cooked food for him which wasn’t good in taste but he praised her cooking proving himself good .
3. Habitual Liars - They are in the habit of lying as it is easier and more convenient for them than telling the truth . People usually don’t trust them .e.g. most politicians are habitual liars
4 . Compulsive liars - They feel high when they easily pass off with lying .e.g if your friend asks you about your favorite hero and you don’t like his favorite hero but you will lie and praise his hero .
Bottom Line -You may prefer not to be in a relationship where you are unhappy with someone’s lies . Lies , which can save someone’s life in danger , are usually acceptable in society .
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