Chapter 1
Cuckoo … Cuckoo …Cuckoo
In India, Ayurveda and Siddha medical science has been known for the use of “alchemical formulas”. “Navapashanam” is one of the most acclaimed siddha elixirs known to mankind. Navapashanam is an amalgam of 9 poisonous herbs , and it's also the most closely guarded ancient secret formula given by master siddha alchemist's.
Nava means “nine”.Pashanam means “poisonous”.Navapashanam is supposed to have high cosmic energy to balance and harmonize all chakras in the body. That is why the people in India worship a Shiva Linga made of Navapashanam.
Rajitha was in deep sleep! She did not sleep naturally… the injection that Raju gave her, made her sleep like that. She needs a good rest now! Raju was looking at her without blinking his eyes, she was sleeping like a cute little teddy bear. Near him was his wife Raji sitting in a wooden stool, she was almost frozen and looked like a statue. Only the sound of a old ceiling fan rotating above their head was heard in that pin drop silence. Then the sound of heart beats of three people followed by the ‘tick,tick’sound of the wall clock. It was midnight, a street dog was barking now and then to show that it has seen something which the human eyes cannot see.
Raju was living in a rented house in Kollam. When everyone in the street was in deep sleep, only Raju and his wife had no sleep. Rajitha’s medical report which was lying on the adjacent table was fluttering in the wind coming from the ceiling fan. Raju did not liked to have a second look on it.They were not mere papers! In it were written the remaining days for which Rajitha will be alive. An X-ray film inside a big yellow cover, MRI,ECG reports in a cover, some more reports in another cover. They all have cost them almost twenty five thousand rupees in total. Behind that twenty five thousand was Raji’s one and only gold chain. Raju has to pledge it for that money. Only his name carried the meaning ‘King ‘in it. His mind was filled with darkness, he did not find any way to bring light into that darkness. He was already exhausted thinking of it.
Like in an old proverb his life was ‘one step forward and two steps back’, he was born in a middle-class family and was working as an assistant in a local pharmaceutical company. He was earning about ten thousand rupees a month after 15 years of service. After paying for house rent, two-wheeler expenses, mobile phone recharges and electricity bills, he and his wife can just manage to eat two times a day. But he was not even able to save a hundred rupees out of his earnings. The five hundred rupees per month R.D the only savings he had planned with lots of struggle was also came to a standstill in the middle. Living amidst such a lifestyle of poverty they gave birth to a girl child who was afflicted with an unknown disease and was vomiting blood frequently which even the learned professional doctors were not able to diagnose. How can they live peacefully in such a situation? Rajitha was twelve years old now. She will reach puberty anytime. But her illness overtook her before her puberty. They do not know the name of her disease. It was so strange! One of her doctors commented” Only one in a crore will be afflicted with this type of disease, Raju. To my knowledge, there is no medication for this in Allopathy. I do not know if it is available in any other medical fields. But I am almost sure that there are no medicines available for this disease at present. Take care of her. It is not advisable to send her to school. Because, if she is going to play with the other children she will get tired fast, vomit blood and that may lead her to a coma stage …”.These words of the doctor put a full stop to Rajitha’s school life. They had to keep her in bed most of the time. Sometimes she even escape her parents eyes and goes out on the street to play with other kids and fall down unconscious there…
The electronic Cuckoo clock which the couples received as a wedding gift from Raju’s company announced it is 3 am.
Cuckoo … Cuckoo … Cuckoo …!
Raju lifted his head slowly and looked up at the clock. Raji also looked at the clock. Both of their gazes went towards Rajitha. How will it be when you heat up a banana leaf in fire and beat it on the floor and if it is torn into pieces…? Rajitha was lying in the bed almost similar to that! When she was born, she looked so pretty with long hair, a broad forehead, chubby cheeks which will provoke anyone to pinch… She was about 4 kilograms and was very healthy. Everyone used to say “What a beauty? ”on seeing her. The family really got tired of doing all sorts of remedies for removing the evil eyes on both the mother and the child. Raju felt that an angel was born to him. But nobody ever thought that a demon was waiting in the form of a disease to swallow that angel alive.
Raju’s heart became heavier as he was rewinding his memory in slow motion. He even laughed like a crack in frustration. That too in the middle of the night. Raji looked at him and asked, “why are you laughing, dear?”
“Nothing, dear and why are you staring at me like this…?”
“…”
“Mostly I will be the only person in the whole world laughing at this time of night.”
“…”
“We both have become numb and frozen worrying about this all the time. We really got exhausted of facing too many shocks in our life time. Raju the King, Raji the Queen and Rajitha the Princess… our names … so funny is not it dear?”
She also laughed when she understood what he meant to say. She tried to relax herself and got up from her bed. She asked, “Okay, time is up, shall I go and bring that?”
He threw a teary look at her. Then whispered.
“Already you mixed and kept it ready?”
“Yes…”
“…’”
“Why you are thinking? What is there now left with us to hold on ... ?”
“Nothing… but…”
“Hesitating like this every time when we decide on this, finally we have ended up with 3 lakhs in debt now. If we are not going to pay the house rent with interest immediately, the house owner will throw us and all our things out.”
“That is what… Raji pricking my heart. Let us end our life as how we have decided. We don’t need such a miserable life. But should we die in debts?
“What are you talking…? Where will you go to pay off the debts? If we do something illegal and earn money, then is it ok to die as criminals ?”
“what you say is also true Raji… What is the difference between in dying as a debtor and a criminal?”
“You can understand that, right?… then keep quiet. Let me go and bring that poison and we can end our life.”
Raji who left with a strong decision in her mind came back with a bowl in her hand. In that was, the elixir mixed with cyanide.
It’s enough for a mouthful within seconds, their hearts will stop functioning.
s
Raju stared at the bowl.
He smiled but that smile is not out of happiness…
“Do you wonder how I got this elixir?”
“No…I was just thinking how our bad time has made even this elixir into poison.”
“This was given by that Siddha who came to our house, he said that he was coming from the Pon Uthiyur hills and gave this as prasadam. He is about 90 years old, even at this age, he goes to Pon Uthiyur every month without fail.”
“He is very healthy right…. Okay leave it! Have you mixed the cyanide, properly dear?”
“Why…do you have any doubts?”
“No Raji… If I eat a portion that is not properly mixed and if you eat the other portion which has more poison, you will die peacefully but I will survive and will experience hell out of it without you and my dear Rajitha…!”
“How are you able to think like this dear?”
“Raji, every day I am reading in the newspaper news like this ‘Lovers attempted to commit suicide, the girl died and the boy survived and the police is seriously enquiring’ … like that”
“Okay, then… you mix it properly…”
Raji handed over the bowl of elixir to him. He once again mixed it and smelled it. He could feel a bitter almond smell.
He kept it down with a heavy heart.
He again looked at her with love. She also looked back.
“This is the last gaze we will have in our lifetime. After we die, we don’t know where we would go? This body and this lifestyle and everything is going to end soon…”
The wave length of their thoughts being same, tears started rolling down from their eyes. Rajitha tossed around and sighed. Now both of them looked at Rajitha.
“Raju…”
“Tell me dear?”
“We have to give this first to Rajitha.”
“Raji…” words got struck in his throat and he was not able to talk anything more. He even forgot that it was midnight and started crying like a baby.
“What happened, dear…?
“Are we going to poison our own child and kill her?”
“How many times are we going to fool ourselves like this? Our love for her is killing her slowly day by day unknowingly. We are not able to cure or treat her, we cannot save her life. We are struggling hard for earning money because we belong to the middle class…”
“No, No Raji … I can’t do this… I can’t do this…”
“If you don’t give… then I have to do it …”
“Alas!… you…”
“Don’t confuse yourself. I have the courage to do this, we are all going to die together. Why to hesitate.”
“I am not able to digest this, Raji! There are so many gods and goddesses in our religion… but not even a single god has shown mercy upon us!”
“Gods? Everything is fake they are only framed portraits. If they were real, they would have answered our prayers by now…”
“Raji… how much penance have you done for all these days? How many Poojas have you done…”
“Leave it… don’t remind me the past. Now only I understand that these Gods are mere stones. We misunderstood and were remaining ignorant despite the fact that they are made up of mud and stone and believed in them.”
Raji got up and went inside the kitchen, from a small cupboard there, she took all the portraits of gods that she was worshipping for years. There was a small Shiva Linga in that. Some neighbors gave it to them after returning from a pilgrimage to Varanasi.
She has done Abhishekam with milk many times for that Shiva Linga.
She broke everything into pieces.
Those which did not break properly, she throwed them on the floor with force to break them again. Some glass pieces pierced in to her hand and blood oozed out.
He screamed, “Oops!… it’s bleeding!” Some drops of blood fell inside the elixir bowl. He immediately tried to push the bowl aside and dress her wound. “Leave it… anyway we are going to die. Where is God? Let him go to hell. Even in the temples, gods like only the rich. The rich can see them very close by purchasing special tickets and the priest, he gives us the holy ash only if we put some currency in his plate. God…! do hell with your god…There are more than six hundred crore human beings in this world. Lakhs of children are born every day. Leaving them all why this god is asking for the life of my child. He only gave her to us and now he wants her back. In our street only that Gopalan, who is selling arrack and killing many people is also living. His daughter is hale and healthy but my poor Rajitha ….why God doesn’t consider all these. Do hell with these gods.
She screamed thinking of her fate. She was standing like a plantain tree that was about to fall down after a storm.
Again silence ruled the place!
The electronic Cuckoo clock announced ….
Time was 4 am.
“Cuckoo … Cuckoo … Cuckoo… Cuckoo…!
At the same time, there was an early morning fortune teller in the street. He was making a ding ..ding ..ding sound with a small wooden stick and a round bronze plate. They could hear that sound very clearly. In front of them was the elixir mixed with cyanide . Drops of Raji’s blood were seen it like an abstract art.
