HALF MOON
CHAPTER - 3
After dropping the bomb shell Rajinder went inside to tend to his evening schedule – to have a bath, change into a kurta pajama and after a cup of tea, to come to the outer veranda where invariably some patients would be sitting and waiting for him. Most of the time they were from his native village or the surrounding ones.
Often these visitors happened to be his relatives. Mehar was expected to come out and pay her respects. Initially she would be reluctant to face their mundane queries about her routine life and would hesitate to come out. But this would infuriate Rajinder further and she would relent grudgingly. With time she learn t to take this in her stride and would immediately make the round of the veranda as soon as the doorbell rang. This kept Rajinder's temper under control on this issue.
Today however she did not care to know who was out there and simply told Tarabai to ask Rajinder if tea was required. She returned to tell that he was sitting alone, as there were no patients.
Janab Singh asked Tarabai to send him in. Rajinder came in and sat in the middle of the four-seater sofa with his legs stretched towards his mother-in-law. She was further agitated. Mehar had been trying hard to make him understand some civilities of living room etiquette since the day she had started to live with him as his wife but it never worked out this way. First of all Mehar's mannerism was too mild for him to register and secondly he did not care for such civilities and was proud of his rough rustic village ways.
Janab Singh finally spoke, “Look son, we did speak to your parents about Mehar finishing her studies after this marriage and they had no objection to that. It was under these conditions that this match was finalized and you two were married. So, now it is your duty to fulfill that promise your parents gave us.”
Rajinder was unmoved, “Papaji, I do not know of any such arrangement and I have told Mehar about this. We have already
discussed about this and by now you must have become familiar about my decision.”
Mehar was already into six months of marriage with Rajinder and she knew him well enough by now. As far as their relationship was concerned Rajinder would not provide any space for Mehar to express her opinions, his was the last word. He would seldom listen to her and even when he did, he would simply ignore her views.
Surjit tried to say something but Rajinder did not let her, “Mummiji, you might have been an officer in your office but in our house men are the ones who speak.”
This was more than enough for Janab Singh too. All through the wedding ceremony and later too there had been many unpleasant incidents witnessed by him on the part of Rajinder's family and he had taken them lightly by constantly reminding himself of the act that the family had always seen tough times. Education that awakens human to the pleasures of finer details of decent social patterns was missing in their case. But he did not expect this kind of rude behavior from Rajinder.
“Look Doctor Sahib, what you are saying may go down the throats of your parents but I do not take this. You are insulting my wife and my daughter's mother, the daughter who incidentally is your wife now. And I strongly oppose it. I ask you to apologize and then we will talk further.” His small eyes had become narrower and his facial contours sharper. Mehar had taken a lot after her father- physical attributes as well as mental and emotional make-up.
Rajinder, though rustic he was, had been living among civilized society for a period of about twelve to thirteen years by now, recognized his folly immediately. He understood that in his haste to hush up the matter and keep a lid over this issue, has misjudged authority of his parents-in-law and now he would have to pay some compensatory price for this. His discomfort became evident as he started shaking his legs furiously. He was sitting just in front of Surjit and this act of him further infuriated her.
She got up immediately and went into the bedroom on the right of the living room. This was the guest room. Mehar and Rajinder shared a larger bedroom at the back of the house. It was separated from the kitchen with a bathroom and the doors to all these rooms opened in a fairly sized lounge. Roof of the house was bare except
For a barsati, which served the purpose of a utility room as it contained one semi automatic washing machine and an iron board. Tarabai would wash the household clothes here and a dhobi(washer-man) would come twice a week to iron them.
Janab Singh followed his wife. They were both tired and listless. Both were worried for their only daughter. While fixing this match they were quite positive about the difference of status between two families. Surjit felt that as she was warmly welcomed in Janab Singh's family for being unique in her stature and higher education, so would be Mehar. But now they had realized that they had committed a blunder in understanding certain facts about Rajinder's family background.
Certainly the behavior pattern of Rajinder was more than worrisome to them. Surjit lay down on the bed and began to wonder aloud about the future of her daughter.
“I do not know what is going to happen now. Mehar is certainly not going to like it. I think we should not have got her married at this age. What will happen now?”
Janab Singh too was perplexed. He, however, tried to bring some comfort to his agitated wife and to his own burdened self,“Let us see how we are able to convince them. This is no joke. He has married our daughter and Mehar cannot be a puppet for his fanciful ideas and have her tending to his needs all the time. We cannot make her sacrifice her life for just being there without any goal and achievements in life.”
Surjit was perturbed,“There is no place for such idealistic views of yours in this man's mind. This we have seen. What do we do now?”
By dinner time atmosphere of the house was a little diffused. All four of them sat on the table and ate silently. Rajinder did try to initiate some conversation but it did not pick up. Tarabai had sensed the tension and she too remained quite. Her face did not show much unhappiness about doing more than her share of work. She seemed to enjoy the turbulence.
After dinner Mehar went to the guest room and before her parents came to retire for the day, she made all arrangements for the night. She made the bed, kept a large jug of water, glasses, cups, and some snacks. Surjit was diabetic and since she was on insulin,
She had to take her meals at regular intervals. Her first cup of tea was invariably prepared by Janab Singh at five in the morning and he would also give her company by having a cup with her. Wherever they went, they would never fail to carry provisions along with an electric kettle with them in the basket. Mehar merely complimented with water and a Thermos of hot milk. Surjit preferred her own tea bags and sweetener.
Mehar avoided being alone with them. She was at a loss with herself. She was unable to comprehend the situation she had landed in and that too without any folly of hers. Finally after giving Tarabai instructions for the following morning's breakfast when she entered her own bedroom, she found Rajinder waiting for her. She was too engrossed within herself to notice anything different. Today, for the first time Rajinder had taken trouble to take out one of he r night dresses and had laid it on the bed in full view. She was surprised when she saw this but failed to feel anything at all.
She was in no mood for that white outfit, which otherwise was her favorite, replaced it in the cupboard and took out a plain block print long cotton gown which she wore quite often. Rajinder did not like this much as it was too plain and did not accentuate her curvaceous body. She put her glass of water on her bedside table and lay down on her side of the bed.
“So...” began Rajinder.
She was so low in her spirits that did not feel like saying anything at all. She simply lay there thinking nothing. It always happened to her, whenever misfortune descended on her, she would become vacant, devoid of anything, any feeling, any thought for a long time and wander in that state of nothingness for a long time, sometimes even for days together, filling herself with the mundane of daily routine. And then suddenly out of the blue, impact of that event would dawn upon her with a thud and she would react, mostly heavily. Janab Singh knew about it and this was the main cause of worry for him.
Now as she lay here embroiled in her own vacuum, she did not listen to what Rajinder had said. Rajinder waited for her answer but when she remained silent for quite some time, he asked in a soft tone, “Are you very tired today?”
This was rare. Rajinder barely spoke in such a tone. This was another of his rustic ideas, though he did not share with her but she had understood by now. After about a fortnight of their wedding, during one intimate moment he felt very soft towards her and called her “my beautiful”.
She simply cherished that and said,“I know I am. Tell me more.” He was taken aback. He was not used to such show of confidence in women in general. And that was it. After that outburst of hers, Mehar never heard any flattering comment from him during those long eight years.
Today was a day particularly low and after so much of bitterness around her scathing soul she was just not there.
After waiting for a while he stretched his arm towards her, the only way he knew to make amends. But he did not know that a mind that is busy trying to pick up pieces of shredded heart and insulted soul is least concerned about its own pleasures.
Mehar, for the first time in six months did not allow his hand to touch her, she sensed the naked desire and quickly got up from the bed. She picked up her pillow and without a glance towards him, left the room to sleep elsewhere.
As she lay in the other room, she did not know that this act of hers that day had instilled a seed of fear in Rajinder's confidence that believed in his capabilities as a male member of society and felt privileged by this fact alone. Today with this absent-minded act of defiance, Mehar had turned tables and this was not going to be easily digested by Rajinder. He was seething with anger and UN-avenged hunger for female body.
Morning came and Mehar became busy with the routine she had set for herself from the day she had moved into this house with Rajinder as his wife. Today as he r parents were also here she had to tend to their requirements too. Surjit wanted paranthas for her breakfast. Janab Singh was a man with a very easy and a carefree disposition. .Generally he would eat whatever his wife would order. Rajinder asked for boiled eggs with toast and some vegetable poha. Mehar had sensed his anger, which today he was not able to express openly because of her parent's presence. She was busy with Tarabai in the kitchen, when Janab Singh asked Rajinder to come and sit with him.
Rajinder usually left for hospital at nine'o clock in the morning, and it was eight'o clock, so he still had about one hour at his disposal. Grudgingly he sat in one of the dining chairs, as far away as possible from Janab Singh. After last night's fiasco with Mehar he was a little more worried now, was very cautious and wanted to be careful with his words.
Janab Singh did not mince his words.
“Listen, son, whatever you think about education or for that matter women's education cannot be your personal matter, since it is our daughter who is your wife. And it is her education we are talking about, so I do want to make it clear that if she wishes she will study further. Neither me, nor her mother or you can take decisions on that. This has to be and will be her sole decision.”
“But Papaji...” Rajinder tried to say something when he saw Surjit entering the room and remained silent.
His last night's rude behavior came back to him and he could sense the anger in Surjit's posture. She did not even acknowledge Rajinder's presence and sat down on a chair next to her husband.
Surjit demanded her breakfast and soon all four were eating without a word or so much as a casual glance at each other. The air in the room was heavy, heavy with Rajinder's arrogant anger for not being able to put his foot down, Surjit's irritation for being in the same room as Rajinder, Janab Singh's worries about the future of her daughter and Mehar's disappointment with the life she was led into, without much of it her own doing.
Soon the breakfast was over and Surjit retired to the guest room. Mehar went to her own bedroom, she wanted to be with herself for the rest of the day. She had no clue what was in store for her.
Rajinder was just about to get up when Janab Singh gestured him to sit down and he sat down again.
“So, son, the interview for the admission is still two weeks ahead. Mehar had not been with us for quite some time, so she should come with us for a few days. Meanwhile you can think about it.”
“But, Papaji I have already told you about what I want.” There was some change. Rajinder's tone was not that rough now.
“Yes, son, we know that, but I still want you to think about it.
You need to think about Mehar also. She is your wife.”
“Yes, Papaji, and because of this status of hers she has some duties towards me, to look after me, the house and take care of my demands.” It had never been easy for Rajinder to come out of his own mold ever. Most of the times he would think about himself.
Mehar had noted this in many different situations by now. Whenever he had any medical achievement he would always be full of self-praise. When he saved a patient from almost inevitable death, he remained engulfed in self-praise for many days to come. The relief or the joy of that patient's loved ones did not touch him at all.
Now, sitting at this moment in front of his father-in-law Janab Singh, who incidentally was a very patient man and a good listener, he seemed to have lost most of his edge.
Janab Singh continued, “Look, son, you do think about her duties towards you, that is fine. She has to take care of you and the house too. But she can do all that along with her studies. You just have to be a little patient. Just try to understand. I don't want to put pressure on you for anything, but I ask you to think about this with a calm mind and an open heart.” Rajinder was about to say something when Janab Singh stopped him with the gesture of his hand.
“And son, Mehar had not been with us for quite some time, so we have decided to take her with us this afternoon. She will stay there for some time. That interview for admission is still two weeks away. We will send her by then.”
Janab Singh had played an upper hand and threw Rajinder in a tight corner. Rajinder did not know that Janab Singh had seen Mehar sleeping in the living room in the middle of the night and he did not want this situation to go out of control. Janab Singh had decided to take Mehar away from this bitterness which had crept into Rajinder and Mehar's life and give them some space to understand value of togetherness.
Rajinder tried to dissuade him but Janab Singh would not listen. So, finally he gave in and Janab Singh got up. It was nine'o clock by now. Rajinder too got up and left for hospital.
Janab Singh came to Surjit who was sitting on sofa in front of the large living room window. She was looking outside and was talking to Tarabai about the daily routine of household. Surjit always had a
Knack about these things. Wherever she went, she would easily get into details of daily lives of the people around and many a times used this information to her advantage. This was a practice she had learned and adapted as she worked for many years as an educationalist and an administrator. Mehar on the other hand had n such interest in these mundane details, not even her own. She would find them boring, worthless and stayed away from them as much as possible. She would take matters in her hands only when a dire need arose or if some crisis had happened and needed immediate attention. For such circumstances she was not really experienced and often it would be Tarabai who would have to bear the burden of every eventuality.
This time too Tarabai was narrating an incident when Janab Singh entered living room. Surjit and Tarabai were laughing out loud.
Surjit said, “This girl is always like this. When she was about three she went after that maid without her knowledge and when the maid disappeared she simply sat down outside a house. It was just our good luck that our neighbor saw her, picked her and brought her home. We did not realize till then that she was missing.”
Tarabai laughed loud,“Yes, Mataji, Didi went with Mrs. Kapoor and did not return the whole day. Dr. Sahib came back from hospital, I gave him his tea. He attended his patients and by that time Didi had not returned. Then he was infuriated and he went to Mrs. Kapoor's house and brought her back. He did not speak to her for three days and Didi too would just keep her mouth shut. She would not even speak to me.”
Just then Tarabai saw Janab Singh standing close to her. He gave her a hard look, she reluctantly moved towards the kitchen. Janab Singh always disliked being too friendly with servants and Surjit was simply opposite to that. She was very friendly with all the people she had at her home as well as office. This issue was a major cause of friction between the two. Now too Janab Singh felt like offering a few words of caution but there were other major issues he wanted to address.
He knew Surjit wanted to settle this issue of Mehar's admission for post graduation then and there. But he felt that if they tried to do any such thing it might get out of control. So he deferred the matter and was certain that Surjit was not going to like this.
He sat down on his armchair in order to give himself some time to break the news. Surjit was looking out of the window into a small garden. It was a small rectangular piece of earth with spots of dry grass in between, sunlight touched only a small portion of it with the result that the plants did not grow healthy there. Mehar wanted to have a lush green garden but she did not have the requisite knowledge and patience to nurture one. Moreover, Rajinder did no t have a taste for it. He never so much as even bothered to check if there were any plants in the pot s or they were just plain empty vessels containing dry earth.
Finally Janab Singh spoke, “I have told Rajinder that Mehar is coming with us for a few days.”
Surjit looked at him in disbelief. She had just opened her mouth when Janab Singh spoke gain,“I know. But the interview will take place after two weeks. We will make him understand by then. Let us take Mehar with us. She will s pend some time at Ganga Nagar.”
By then Mehar had also come there and was a little relieved to know of this.
She asked, “When do we leave?”
“This afternoon after lunch. Tell Hari Ram, we will leave around two clock” was all Janab Singh said.
Mehar did not want to know more. She was delighted that she was going with them. Despite her best of efforts she always felt some heaviness in the very air of her house. It would lift temporarily in between when Rajinder did not have his unexpected temper bursts. But this lightness seldom lasted more than a few days and Mehar would again be left at the mercy of Tarabai, who would try to add some cheer to otherwise gloomy atmosphere of the house.
Mehar was purely delighted at the prospect of being able to be away from this gloom for a few days.
