Chapter : 2
“Lag ja gale k fir ye hasin raat ho na ho
Shayad iss janam me mulakat ho na ho”
The suddenly applied break opened my eyes, I got up and looked around, I was in moving car.
“Drive slowly yaar” I spoke and looked at driver’s seat.
“You are controlling me, so ultimately you are controlling all the movements of car, The speed! Direction! And all other things” inner me spoke.
“It is amazing, the way how you got in the shape of people I like to be around, these are my friends clothes, from where did you get this?” I asked.
“I am your closest friend” inner me spoke.
“What you were saying yesterday? Dekh bhai…Vo bhale hi mujhe pasand ho, bhale hi mujhe extraordinary feeling ho lekin vo pehle meri sabse a66i dost hai, so I exactly know mujhe kaha tak jaana hai” inner me spoke and laughed.
“Yes…that is true” I said.
“How can you limit love?” the inner me asked.
“Is it something like your maths calculations or some graph in your mind of which considering some parameters you can control on love? What is wrong if you fall in love with your friend? I think and I believe you can only fall in love with your friend, you cannot fall in love to a stranger, you cannot enjoy moments with stranger” inner me spoke and looked on road.
“Yes I know” I said.
“Then why you are saying like I exactly know mujhe kaha tak jaana hai?” inner me asked and looked at me. I remain silent.
“The truth is you already reached the level and now slowly you are realising that you have reached there but you don’t want to believe. You don’t want to believe that you love her because you are more scared of losing her, you are more sacred of your friendship and that’s why you are not accepting it. Naturally it will sound odd but you cannot measure and cannot control on love” inner me said.
“How it is described then?” I asked.
“Brahmacharini” inner me spoke looking on the road. I looked at him.
“Brahma means infinity. It is something which moves in infinity, you will see if it is infinity then what is the point of moving or calculating? If it is infinity then where it can move? But yes, if something at all over then it can move also.” Inner me spoke. I am much confused.
“Today you are in wrong costumes, because none of my friends’ talks like this, you are making me confuse” I spoke.
“I always wear costumes which you want to see, today I am here as your friends because you want to speak out something, you are looking for someone who listens you. I am here to for you my friend, speak anything you want” Inner me spoke.
“Why it is happening right now?” I asked.
“It has already happened, point is just now you are realising it” Inner me spoke.
“Buri tarah se phas rahe hai hum” I spoke.
“This thinking is wrong” inner me spoke.
“Love is not static, it is dynamic, and like the ocean doesn’t go anywhere though waves of ocean keeps moving. The love thing was always present in you but your thought keeps you moving, it is the movement in infinity. The virgin aspect of energy is love. Here we are talking about newness. Though sun throws rays everyday on earth but you can feel the newness in its rays every day because sun rays are virgin aspect of energy and just like that love is also virgin, every time it brings newness in you” Inner me spoke.
“So you are saying that my love towards her is natural” I asked.
“Yes, it is very natural and also pure, you love her because she is your friend” the inner me spoke.
“My feelings will not affect my friendship then” I asked.
“You are here to perform your karma, let the God decide outcome” inner me spoke.
“Will she accept it?” I asked.
“There is no meaning of thinking on that. If you are waiting for her to accept then you are doing a deal. It is not love, if your love is going to end if she rejects then you are doing a deal. The love that withstands rejection, without turning into bitterness, is real love. It liberates you but with such love in your heart, you no longer look for liberation. It might be called as one sided love and it is considered as unfortunate but I say lucky are those whose love is one sided” inner me spoke.
“What should I do then” I asked looking at him, he just laughed.
“You know we can discuss it seating in a locked room or at in any hotel but why I am driving this car for you?” inner me asked, I looked at him, confused.
“That is because you can enjoy atmosphere, you can enjoy moments, we are here moving in space and as I said space is not static, we are moving means we are dynamic, you should enjoy the ride other than just sitting idle and thinking what to do next. Love is also movement in infinity and if you feel you are in love then you must enjoy the ride” the inner me spoke.
“And perform your karma, why you focus on outcome…”
The fast moving truck collapsed with our car as inner me was continuously looking at me, car jumped on divider and my eyes got closed, moments after when I opened my eyes I was in my bed. I checked my body, everything was alright, it was dream. I took a deep breath and imagined work for the long day.
