What is the opposite of Happiness?
Sadness? The answer is No!
If we aren’t happy, that doesn’t mean by default we are sad. It means that we are neither Happy or Sad. It’s similar to being in a neutral state. But the bigger question here is, is it really that wrong to be sad, or to not be happy? Do we always have to be happy and cheerful and smiling to show our best mental state?
Again, the answer is No. We don’t! Rather we can’t. I am going to go a step further and say that it’s abnormal to attain a permanent state of happy mental state. It’s going against the human nature.
However, somehow this consumerist society we are living in, is exactly forcing us to do the same. And more so unfortunately, we are doing that to each other too. The media promises to provide us products and services and guarantees happiness in return; eat this, you’ll be happy, buy this, you’ll be happy, do this, you’ll be happy, watch this, you’ll be happy, and so on and on and on.
However, let’s asks ourselves? Don’t we do the same? If someone comes to us, with a face which doesn’t define “happiness”, don’t we do that them?
“Hey, what happened?”, “Nothing yaar…just feeling down..”, “Ohh..okay! Wait…watch this cat video, you’ll laugh your eyes out”…. something like this!
Why have we suddenly become so obsessed with happiness? What is it about “not being happy’, or being “sad” scares us How can as a culture we deny humans the basic right to experience all the emotions they have and not just force them to feel and be in one constant state?
Imagine an alternate world, where humans are ALLOWED AND ONLY SUPPOSED TO BE ANGRY! NO OTHER EMOTION ALLOWED! JUST ANGER…ANGER…ANGER!! This is exactly the pitiful state we are in today.
Frankly, I find this reality scarier than anything else. The fact that we cannot deal or even acknowledge the emotions we experience. Imagine how torturous it is, that one part of your mind is only doing the work on suppressing what you truly feel and keeping up with a facade so that others don’t get uncomfortable…
Because we are stripping away the right to express and be in the state what we truly are, we are pushing ourselves in to the deep crevasses of confusion and an complete inability to deal or even acknowledge our humanness. And after a while, any form of suppression is bound to erupt like a lava and then whether we like it or not, we would have to deal with all of that emotion, gushing out of us, unrestrained and uncontrollable.
How does this suppression actually looks like?
It’s something like this, You are sitting at home doing particularly nothing, and someone from your family member says, “Why the hell are you sitting there pouting? Come on, cheer up?”, you meet your friends and you are in a neutral state, and they say, “What happened? Is anyone dead? Why is your face so long?”. Or you are commuting in the train or bus and you have a bad day, or things didn’t go your way. And all of those thoughts are running in your head. So, we quickly remove our phone, or either watch a tiktok video, or a watch a funny movie.
This might happen to us or we might be the one who is doing it.
Such remarks, such defenses are nothing but forced, indirect compulsions which are pushing the person from not accepting his state of mind. If we are really concerned, then we must let them know that if they ever want to talk, we are there. BUT THESE REMARKS DON’T SERVE THAT PURPOSE! NEVER!!
Frankly, what truly constitutes being happy is a different question all together, something which I would like to focus in my next post. But here, I would just like reiterate that there is no permanent state our mind is and can ever be.
I frankly do not believe that there is any state of homeostasis for the mind; for the body, yes! But for the mind, not really! It’s an ever-evolving aspect of our selves, which we need to embrace it.
It’s paradoxical but the day we truly lift that pressure off, of being happy, and cheerful and being the light of your home or social circle, it is then that we truly go a step forward towards a breathing, healthy mind.
So, next time we have this compulsion to suppress or push someone or ourselves immediately from the state of what they truly feel without giving it its due, let us just pause for a moment and let us just be!
The end !
