NOBODY LIGHTS A CANDLE
Anjali Deshpande
25
Why are there homes, Pushpa often asked herself. Now she was convinced that a home was designed as a highly sophisticated weapon to kill humans. If a home had been invented as a source of tranquility and rest that concept and that home had been buried a long time ago, so long a time ago that even its fossil would not be available to thought-archaeologists. Ever since Adhirath had been suspended the home had become a greater burden. She had no complaints against her in-laws. They were what they were but Adhirath had changed so much. No laughter, no pleasant banter. They hardly ever went out anywhere. Now he had all the time and she could get some leave of absence and they could go out to places that was not possible when he was in charge of a police station. But now even uttering a word was like exploding a bomb. Life felt like she was walking on landmines. She used to think once the enquiry is over everything would return to normal. But ever since the notice arrived Adhirath had begun disappear from home for entire days and till late at night. In the morning he would drop Varun to school and vanish. When could she talk to him? If she broached the subject at dinner she was afraid he would not eat. Afterwards he turned such a stiff back on her that she could not say a word to him. That day she had decided that she would talk to him however late he came home, even if they had to be up all night. That night what she was afraid of came to transpire. By the time Adhir returned it was nearly ten. Daulatram never needed any excuse to get drunk but if he found one he thought wasting it was foolish. So he had been drinking since eight. A large plate of salad, two bowls of namkeen and the fast depleting contents of a bottle were evidence of his concern for his son. He began to scold Adhir the moment he returned.
“SO you have begun practicing the ways of a thanedaar? You can dial our number sometime. Do you ever remember that you have a wife, a child and a worried mother at home. The father is of course a useless fool…”
Adhirath had run upstairs. Pushpa took out cold food in a thali and went up. By the time he came back from the washroom wiping his face she had poured rum in two glasses.
“You have made a lot of preparations today. Stole bapu’s stock, have you?” Adhir asked.
“Bought it. And you had to come so late today,” she complained.
Adhir downed the first peg like a glass of water.
“You have a lot of tension, isn’t it?”asked Pushpa and began to caress the back of his hand.
“you know we have nobody to back us up. Tell me how many Jatavs are there in the force? And whatever there are will not support me, they will only back off.”
“There is a way, I am telling you…”
“What?”
“I have thought a lot about this. If we get hold of someone…”
“I will go to jail. You will take care of everything won’t you? How ashamed Varun will be.”
“Shut up. Nothing of the sort will happen.”
“It will take time. It will…” Adhirath poured himself a large one and began to take large swigs from the glass. “You did very well, got this. SO good.”
“Where were you till now? Drinking on empty stomach can make you drunk very fast.”
“The world is a very bad place. A single woman is not allowed any peace,” Adhirath said. “They run her into a pros. You would know. You could be dealing with so many such cases, they get reported on the helpline.”
Pushpa ate her dinner. She also managed to feed her husband a little. She could not do what she had planned to do. In the morning she took Varun to her father-in-law and placing his little palm in his hand said good bye to the child and called her office to say she had an upset stomach and would be late. When she took tea upstairs Adhirath sat in the room completely demoralized.
The moment he saw her he stood up and said, “Will go.”
“Papaji has taken him to school. Sit down. I want to talk to you.”
Adhirath looked at his wife. A policewoman stood in front of him. Not in uniform. But can you miss that tone of the cop anywhere in the world? Like he goes without an uniform and uses that tone. Wow, what investigation he has been conducting. If this woman heard about it she would pat his back vigorously, this woman who was about to don an uniform to become something else in a while.
“Shall I tell you what investigations I have carried out? I should write down everything. All the statements. Now the culprit will be caught soon. There are many clues.”
Pushpa said, “I have taken a half day leave. Unofficially. We will work on your unofficial case later. First let us discuss the enquiry.”
“You can teach anyone how to spoil someone’s mood early in the morning. There are no rolling pins and togs to bang so come throw that enquiry to my head.”
“If you run your troubles will be by your side, you can’t leave them behind.”
Folding his hands and bowing before her Adhir said, “Say, have your say.”
“Can you ever discuss anything like this? DO whatever you want to,” Pushpa exploded in anger. She turned and went downstairs. When he got down half an hour later she was ready to leave.
“Wait, I will drop you on the bike,” Adhir said. Without speaking a word she left the house. Adhirath was still in the rumpled clothes he had worn to bed yesterday. Crumpled shirt. Crushed trousers. He got onto his bike the way he was, and kick started it. Pushpa had hailed a rickshaw and was on her way to the bus stand. He followed her. when she got down at the bus stop he parked in front of her. She began to laugh despite herself and got onto the bike. He turned it to Madhu Vihar market where they went inside the sweet shop. Sitting at a table he said, “Now tell me.”
“When we get hold of someone and bring him to the thana what does he do?”
“Soils his pants,” said Adhirath.
Pushpa laughed again. “He denies everything. Subsequently he is acquitted by the court also. You should also do this. Simply deny everything.”
“Really?” asked Adhir in a mocking tone.
“I have given it a lot of thought. If you deny everything the onus of proving it falls on them. Let them prove what they say.”
“You have begun to think you are very smart! Haven’t you? Till now you haven’t become an inspector. Stay within your boundaries, don’t cross the limits,” Adhirath said in a very cold tone with such an indifferent tone that a judge would be envious of it.
Leaving the half empty glass of lassi on the table Pushpa got up and left. It was just as well that Adhirath had some money in the pocket of his trousers. He sat around for a long while sipping at his lassi. A waiter came several times to wipe the table but Adhirath paid no attention to his attempts to drive him away. He kept sipping at the lassi slowly. After all it was only a glass full of liquid and at some point of time it had to finish. He had to leave.
He had just reached home when his mobile began to ring. Nitesh was calling. He said he was coming that way so he would drop by. He had spoken to someone in the legal department and found out about a lawyer. Will come and tell him. And only today the wife had left without cooking. Pushpa had earlier planned to go late so she had postponed the cooking. Then she left without caring about lunch. His mother got up to put on daal to boil.
“You could make barley rotis today. Should I get some barley flour from the mill?”” asked Daulatram.
Adhirath called Nitesh on his mobile but he did not take the call. He went upstairs and quickly changed into something presentable and walked up and down the road. The moment he spotted the jeep he ran towards it and saying that there was something going on in the house, he would go wherever Nitesh was going and they could talk on the way. Nitesh said that it would be good if he did not come with him. He was on official duty and would go alone. He would return in half an hour or so.
Defeated he went upstairs and lay down. He began to regret having been so harsh with Pushpa. Then he took off his clothes and went into bathe and took a long time doing so. When he got out of the bathroom he simply could not sit in the room waiting for Nitesh. The tent house owners were once again loading the tempo. He heard the loud clanking of pipes as he came downstairs. As if they were mocking him.
“Saale, day and night you create a racket. Is this any place to live? Not a commercial place, this is. You have screwed people’s lives,” he said kicking at one of the pipes. Then he bent and picked up a small rod of iron and flung it on the top of the heap of tent flaps. “I will get your business shut down. What do you think of yourselves?” he screamed. Bapu came running. With great difficulty he dragged him inside the house. Mother was standing in the doorframe of the partition, her hands dusted with flour.
“You must keep on good terms with neighbours,” she was saying. He shook off his father’s grip on his arms and ran out and became part of the crowd and noise taking long strides away from home. The mobile must have rung at least three times before he heard it. Nitesh was at his house. By now some of his rage had gone down. He came back trying to control himself. He saw Nitesh stab a puffed-up roti with a spoon. A bowl of ghee sat on the table. When he poured the melted fat onto the roti it ran inside the hole made with the spoon.
“What daal, man, I just couldn’t stop myself,” Nitesh said. He looked very happy. The rotis were that of wheat, perhaps there had been no barley flour in the mill.
“You too come and eat,” said his mother. “He is just so tense,” she said to Nitesh.
“I called that lawyer. We have to meet him at three pm. Let us go.” He said biting into a fried green chilli.
Adhirath sat down to eat uninterestedly. The first morsel he took into his mouth changed his mood dramatically. He suddenly realized that he was terribly hungry. The roti was truly unequalled. He was eating a roti made by his mother after a long long time. She made it with moist hands without using any dusting the dough with flour, without using a rolling pin or a board. She took a roll of dough in her damp hands and patted it into a roundel and roasted it slowly on the griddle. Thick rotis, crisp on the outside and soft inside. One could eat such rotis with chutney and find it heavenly. Here she had served such a daal that you could drink bowls of it without any accompaniment. And that green chilli fried with salt. His irritation went down. He ate with gusto.
“The case is nearly cracked,” said Nitesh when they got into the jeep. “I have got a warrant to search the farmhouse. That Parduman? He is the one who did it.”
“Really? And that Udairaj? What is his role?”
“He was at home only. We got the mobile traced. The whole day its location was the same. At night also the location did not change. It was in the house. He never left the house.”
“You apprehended him? Parduman?”
“Absconding,” Nitesh said. “We are looking for him. Can’t find him.”
He could be on the farm. Cheti is so scared he leaves at night to go sleep at Nachchatar’s and this guy must be hiding there. Perhaps he locked the place from the outside in the day and at night entered the house. Cheti was right, he had come to the farmhouse that day. HE did not tell Nitesh about his suspicions or his findings.
email: anjalides@gmail.com
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