Beyond The Water
(Translation of Hindi Novel - Jal Tu Jalal Tu)
(6)
Till noon Rasbi was in a deep sleep almost in a state of unconsciousness. When she opened her eyes she realized she had fallen down and was lying on the floor. She had tried to imprison the heavy sheet of tidal waves in her hand but it was the bed sheet she was gripping tightly in her hand. The blood on her palms had dried.
She introspected the violent tempest of feelings that shook her, though Kinjan had gone only for a few days. When he leaves this world forever just for his demented craze, what will happen? There are testing times, she was well aware of the results and still was entirely helpless.
Isn’t there anything that would give him a yearning binding that he would long to live? Ag yes, his girl-friend….. What’s her name? Just imagine she doesn’t even know her name! Should Rasbi call her and ask her to convince Kinjan with her love? Rasbi recalled how happy he was when he was alone with her. Rasbi felt embarrassed, yet surprised how long he was with her, almost lost in her, who taught Kinjan all this?
A sense of guilt engulfed her. She was his mother. What rubbish she was thinking about her own son! Her son was no more a child now. Gone were the days when she herself used to take off his clothes and massaged him before giving him a wash. How the boy had grown into a young man! So aware! So know ledge able! He got up, sweating. She held her breath! What type of mother she was, standing on the thresh hold of her own house and seeing all this, only because she had come earlier then expected!
Should she unite them together by lying a knot between these two.
After spending the exciting days in aspiration thrills exhilaration and enthusiasm, when Kinjan and Ernest returned to Buffalo they found the ill Rasbi being looked after by friendly neighbors. They also came to know she had a massive heartattack. Now that Kinjan had come all the well-wishers and Ernest prepared to go leaving Rasbi in his car, Kinjan saw them off with a heavy heart and felt a sense of guilty consciousness.
Her son was back and Rasbi soon showed signs of improvement. After a few days she would get up and do a few domestic cores. She hoped against hope that for some days at least Kinjan would be away from the shadow of his infatuation.
But very soon, an invisible voice deemed to echo in the surroundings of that house, “Death is a companion and I have friends like the sun and the moon, who is there then who’ll teach us to relax?” two more days passed somehow but just as after autumn, spring comes and new leaves peep out from the bared trees, Kinjan’s dreams began to emerge again which was like a snow fall on Rasbi’s hopes.
One day during noon, Rasbi went to market without informing Kinjan and brought an enlarged photograph of his late father, beautifully framed. She hung it on a wall with great respect without taking any help from her son. Kinjan was surprised because he had never seen that photograph before. He kept on gazing at it and did not know what to tell his mother. But before he could open his lips to comment Rasbi blurted out. “He gave his life for his country. At least someone should be there to remember his sacrifice.”
Kinjan looked at the photograph and touched his chest and eyes as a token respect without realizing the taunt that was there in his mother’s tone. On the contrary he was animated and in his excitement, started showing her the photographs that had been published in the New York newspapers. His mother on the other hand, looked at those photograph as if Kinjan was showing her the X-Ray plates that had been taken when she was so ill.
Buffalo did not remain untouched from the media reports of New York and soon some children recognized Kinjan’s boat and gathered round it.
One night when Kinjan left home after dinner Rasbi got surpicious. She couldn’t ask him anything but got so nervous that she felt ill. She applied a big scarf like a bandage on her head, put dark goggles, wiped her tears and followed her son. Kinjan just went strolling at an easy pace. The whole city was bathed in colourful lights. The waterfall was a long way but the splash like spray seemed to drench the city in the form of a cloud.
Rasbi had lost all assurance all confidence. In spite of trying all her tricks and pressures to stop Kinjan from pursuing his crazy dream, Kinjan was making preparation for his expedition. He could go on that perilious fatal trip any moment. Rasbi knew very well that as soon as Kinjan starts his expedition it would mean an immediate end. Hundreds of people had tried to probe that sheet of water that seemed to stretch from sky to earth but the mass of water had swallowed all of them, none was alive, then how could Kinjan, an adolescent, who did not even have a proper hair line over his upper lip could succed. There was no other hue in her surprise other than depression.
She gathered all her strength to follow him as she did not want to take risk even for a moment. Anything could happen. She wished her son would take a walk in the dark night, would meet friends, may go anywhere or do anything but would come back: She kept an eye on him and increased her pace.
Kinjan was walking at an easy pace in the road that passed near the enormous waterfall but now he turned towards the road that lead to the river side and his speed increased. Rasbi had to run to follow him. She was panting heavily and thought of hiring a taxi. But she did not know know how far and where Kinjan was going and what would the driver think: She, following a young man during such late hours, who happened to be her son!
She gave up the idia of taking a taxi, gathered all her courage and tried to walk faster. Soon a boy emerged out of lanes and met Kinjan. Although it was quite dark, Rasbi knew he was Ernest. She felt relieved that the boy is Kinjan’s friend.
The road that ran parallel to the uproarious river was absolutely deserted. The small trees and bushes on sides gave the terrain a mingled look of garden and a forest.
The friends stopped under a big dense tree. Rasbi felt a sense of relief. Ernest removed some dry leaves and grass and pulled pot on iron pipe. Rasbi was sure they had been to this place earlier too. Soon Ernest took is this place of coloured cloth and tied it is one end of the pipe. By the time he lifted the piper to straighter it Kinjan had climbed into the tree like a monkey. He pulled the pipe and tied it to a branch that was very high. Rasbi standing at a comfortable distance, wondered. She had never seen Kinjan climbing as tree like that.
And now, the national flag of America was flapping in the breeze, so high, so dignified. She wiped her tears and could stand there no longer. She turned back. She did not want Kinjan to know she had followed him stealthily.
She came back now that her mission was over. She knows the place from where Kinjan was going to start his crazy journey.
The river, meandering for about five and half kilometer, fell down as the unbelievable, magnanimous endless stretch of water known as the world famous Niagra falls. The broad river formed a border line between America and Canada. On both the sides blocks of light illuminated the two cities and they looked beautiful. This deserted forest was there between the two.
The friends had brought some posters and pasted then on trees. Rasbi had already left.
Ernest took out a small torch from his pocket and focused the beam on the water perhaps he had seen the saffron coloured tamarind shaped fish.
Rasbi was returning home .she was upset and distressed. Filled with contempt she was contemplating what she had got out of her life! She still had the dark impression of those child hood days when a woman had been killed by her mother in a row over a bucketful of water. She incident had deprived her of the protection of her father as she had to stay in her mother`s cell in prison.
Rasbi was thinking, should she end her own life before losing Kinjan for ever frightening thoughts were following one after the other as she walked along the bank of the river. But, just like the waves rising and falling in the river one thought eliminated the other and with heavy steps she reached home.
Running just extremely nervous and wondering philosophically about life Rasbi had returned home. She went straight to bed as if she knew nothing. And actually she did not come to know when Kinjan returned or whether he come that night or not.
She was constantly gazing at the ceiling morning an old song, “Everyone will have to sleep. Night has thought a ‘pares’ stone. Whoever shall be touched by night, will forget the day…” sleep seemed for form her eyes. Her exhaustion, her restlessness all had deserted her. She was no more afraid.
She felt she had been to the ominous place chosen by destiny to execute her son, had seen it with her own eyes. Rasbi cried her heart out and kept on crying till sleep engulfed her.
Rasbi had seen that water fall umpteen times but this infinite enormous mass of water had never given a clue that one day it would demand her son, or rather claim his life after crossing the fall. There was the stormy water flowing like on electrified devastating current that flowed ravishing up to whirlpool on one side and her own son, whom she had given birth, who had looked like freshly spun cotton and was now the threshold of adolescence and youth on the other.
Rasbi met Kinjan’s bellowed and she caught her in a strong hold. The girl started running from her but Rasbi ran after her frantically. People on the road thought she was insane. She somehow reached the girl, caught. Her by shoulders and shook her, tell me! Can you do this little bit of work, just tell a lie, a little lie?”
The girl was shocked as well as frightened so closed her eyes, she couldn’t utter a word. Rasbi almost shouted, “Tell him a lie, If he can dream of winning the world. He can do this as well. Just go and tell him, you are pregnant, expecting his child.”
God know what happened, the girl got lost and so were the spectators. Rasbi had a series of such awful dreams.
Next day, while preparing breakfast, she suddenly blurted out,” has anyone in the world succeeded in doing this suicidical act for which you are going to sacrifice your life?”
Kinjan was taken aback by this abrupt question but said carefully, “what are you telling mom, everything has been attained in the world goner or later and has been done by someone.”
“I will sue you for killing my son.”
Kinjan laughed, then said seriously,’ If I succeed you will lose the case and if I do not…”
‘Yes! Yes! Complete what you were saying! I say why did you stop? Come on, out with it!’ she took out a hot plate from the oven and threw it with all the force at her son. The sharp edge of the plate hit Kinjan and blood began to ooze out from his forehead. He gave a little yell and pressed his plan against the wound. With the other hand he took out his big handkerchief and tied it round his head. The honky was soaked with blood to.
***
