Tobias Smollett CHAPTER IOf my Birth and Parentage I was born in the northern part of this united kingdom, the house of my grandfather, a gentleman of considerable fortune and influence, who had on many occasions signalised himself in behalf of his country; and was remarkable for his abilities in the law, which he exercised with great success in the station of a judge, particularly against beggars, for whom he had a singular aversion. My father (his youngest son) falling in love with a poor relation, who lived with the old gentleman in quality of a housekeeper, espoused her ...Read More

CHAPTER II I grow up—am hated by my Relations—sent to School—neglected by my Grandfather—maltreated by my Master—seasoned to Adversity—I Cabals against the Pedant—am debarred Access to my Grandfather—hunted by his Heir—I demolish the Teeth of his Tutor There were not wanting some who suspected my uncles of being concerned in my father’s fate, on the supposition that they would all share in the patrimony destined for him; and this conjecture was strengthened by reflecting that in all his calamities they never discovered the least inclination to serve him; but, on the contrary, by all the artifices in their power, ...Read More

CHAPTER III My Mother’s Brother arrives—relieves me—a Description of him—he goes along with me to the House of my encountered by his Dogs—defeats them, after a bloody Engagement—is admitted to the old Gentleman—a Dialogue between them About this time my mother’s only brother, who had been long abroad, lieutenant of a man-of-war, arrived in his own country; where being informed of my condition, he came to see me, and out of his slender finances not only supplied me with what necessaries I wanted for the present, but resolved not to leave the country until he had prevailed on my ...Read More

CHAPTER IV My Grandfather makes his Will—our second Visit—he Dies—his Will is read in Presence of all his living Disappointment of my female Cousins—my Uncle’s Behaviour A few weeks after our first visit, we were informed that the old judge, at the end of a fit of thoughtfulness, which lasted three days, had sent for a notary and made his will; that the distemper had mounted from his legs to his stomach, and, being conscious of his approaching end, he had desired to see all his descendants without exception. In obedience to this summons, my uncle set out with ...Read More

CHAPTER V The Schoolmaster uses me barbarously—I form a Project of Revenge, in which I am assisted by my leave the Village—am settled at a University by his Generosity On our way back to the village, my uncle spoke not a word during the space of a whole hour, but whistled with great vehemence the tune of “Why should we quarrel for riches,” etc. his visage being contracted all the while into a most formidable frown. At length his pace increased to such a degree that I was left behind a considerable way: then he waited for me; and ...Read More

CHAPTER VI I make great progress in my Studies—am caressed by Everybody—my female Cousins take notice of me—I reject Invitation—they are incensed, and conspire against me—am left destitute by a Misfortune that befalls my Uncle—Gawky’s Treachery—my Revenge As I was now capable of reflection, I began to consider my precarious situation; that I was utterly abandoned by those whose duty it was to protect me: and that my sole dependence was on the generosity of one man, who was not only exposed by his profession to continual dangers, which might one day deprive me of him for ever; but ...Read More

CHAPTER VII I am entertained by Mr. Crab—a description of him—I acquire the Art of Surgery—consult Crab’s Disposition—become necessary him—an Accident happens—he advises me to launch out into the world—assists me with Money—I set out for London The fumes of my resentment being dissipated, as well as the vanity of my success, I found myself deserted to all the horrors of extreme want, and avoided by mankind as a creature of a different species, or rather as a solitary being, noways comprehended within the scheme or protection of Providence. My despair had rendered me almost quite stupified, when I ...Read More

CHAPTER VIII I arrive at Newcastle—meet with my old Schoolfellow Strap—we determine to walk together to London—set out on Journey—put up at a solitary Alehouse—are disturbed by a strange Adventure in the Night There is no such convenience as a waggon in this country, and my finances were too weak to support the expense of hiring a horse: I determined therefore to set out with the carriers, who transport goods from one place to another on horseback; and this scheme I accordingly put in execution on the 1st day of September, 1739, sitting upon a pack-saddle between two baskets, ...Read More

CHAPTER IX We proceed on our Journey—are overtaken by a Highwayman who fires at Strap—is prevented from shooting me a Company of Horsemen, who ride in pursuit of him—Strap is put to Bed at an Inn—Adventures at that Inn After having paid our score and taken leave of our hostess, who embraced me tenderly at parting, we proceeded on our journey, blessing ourselves that we had come off so well. We had not walked above five miles, when we observed a man on horseback galloping after us, whom we in a short time recognised to be no other than ...Read More

CHAPTER X The Highwayman is taken—we are detained as Evidence against him—proceed to the next village—he escapes—we arrive at inn, where we go to Bed—in the Night we are awaked by a dreadful Adventure—next night we lodge at the house of a Schoolmaster—our Treatment there Strap and I were about to depart on our journey, when we perceived a crowd on the road coming towards us, shouting and hallooing all the way. As it approached, we could discern a man on horseback in the middle, with his hands tied behind him, whom we soon knew to be Rifle. The ...Read More

CHAPTER XI We descry the Waggon—get into it—arrive at an inn—our Fellow Travellers described—a Mistake is committed by Strap, produces strange things We travelled half-a-mile without exchanging one word; my thoughts being engrossed by the knavery of the world, to which I must be daily exposed, and the contemplation of my finances, which began sensibly to diminish. At length, Strap, who could hold no longer, addressed me thus: “Well, fools and their money are soon parted. If my advice had been taken, that old skin-flint should have been d—n’d before he had got more than the third of his ...Read More

CHAPTER XII Captain Weazel challenges Strap, who declines the Combat—an Affair between the Captain and me—the Usurer is fain give Miss Jenny five Guineas for a Release—we are in Danger of losing a Meal—the Behaviour of Weazel, Jenny, and Joey, on that Occasion—an Account of Captain Weazel and his Lady—the Captain’s Courage tried—Isaac’s mirth at the Captain’s Expense Next morning I agreed to give the master of the waggon ten shillings for my passage to London, provided Strap should be allowed to take my place when I should be disposed to walk. At the same time I desired him ...Read More

CHAPTER XIII Strap and I are terrified by an Apparition—Strap’s Conjecture—the Mystery explained by Joey—we arrive in London—our Dress Appearance described—we are insulted in the Street—an Adventure in an Alehouse—we are imposed upon by a waggish Footman—set to rights by a Tobacconist—take Lodgings—dive for a Dinner—an Accident at our Ordinary We arrived at our inn, supped, and went to bed; but Strap’s distemper continuing, he was obliged to rise in the middle of the night, and taking the candle in his hand, which he had left burning for the purpose, he went down to the house of office, whence ...Read More

CHAPTER XIV We visit Strap’s friend—a description of him—his advice—we go to Mr. Cringer’s house—are denied admittance—an Accident befalls behaviour thereupon—an extraordinary adventure occurs, in the course of which I lose all my money In the afternoon my companion proposed to call at his friend’s house, which, we were informed, was in the neighbourhood, whither we accordingly went, and were so lucky as to find him at home. This gentleman, who had come from Scotland three or four years before, kept a school in town, where he taught the Latin, French, and Italian languages; but what he chiefly professed ...Read More

CHAPTER XV Strap moralises—presents his purse to me—we inform our landlord of our misfortune—he unravels the mystery—I present myself Cringer—he recommends and turns me over to Mr. Staytape—I become acquainted with a fellow dependent, who explains the character of Cringer and Staytape—and informs me of the method to be pursued at the Navy Office and Surgeons’ Hall—Strap is employed In our way to our lodging, after a profound silence on both sides, Strap, with a hideous groan, observed that we had brought our pigs to a fine market. To this observation I made no reply, and he went on: ...Read More

CHAPTER XVI My new acquaintance breaks an appointment—I proceed, by myself, to the Navy Office—address me to a person who assists me with advice—write to the Board, they grant me a letter to the Surgeons at the Hall—am informed of the beau’s name and character—find him—he makes me his confidant in an amour—desires me to pawn my linen for his occasions—recover what I lent him—some curious observations on Strap on that occasion—his vanity. In the morning I rose and went to the place of rendezvous, where I waited two hours in vain, and was so exasperated against him for ...Read More

CHAPTER XVII I go to Surgeons’ Hall, when I meet Mr. Jackson—am examined—a fierce dispute arises between two of examiners—Jackson disguises himself to attract respect—irises himself to attract respect—is detected—in hazard of being sent to Bridewell—he treats us at a Tavern—carries us to a Night-house—A troublesome adventure there—we are committed to the Round-house—carried before a Justice—his behaviour With the assistance of this faithful adherent, who gave me almost all the money he earned, I preserved my half-guinea entire till the day of examination, when I went with a quaking heart to Surgeons’ Hall, in order to undergo that ceremony. ...Read More

CHAPTER XVIII I carry my qualification to the Navy Office—the nature of it—the behaviour of the Secretary—Strap’s concern for absence—a battle betwixt him a blacksmith—the troublesome consequences of it—his harangue to me—his friend the schoolmaster recommends me to a French Apothecary, who entertains me as a journeyman I would most willingly have gone home to sleep, but was told by my companions, that we must deliver our letters of qualification at the Navy office, before one o’clock. Accordingly, we went thither, and gave them to the secretary, who opened and read them, and I was mightily pleased to find ...Read More

CHAPTER XIX The character of Mr. Lavement, his wife and daughter—some anecdotes of the family—the mother and daughter rivals—I guilty of a mistake that gives me present satisfaction, but is attended with troublesome consequences Next day, while I was at work in the shop, a bouncing damsel well dressed came on pretence of finding a vial for some use or other; and taking an opportunity, when she thought I did not mind her, of observing me narrowly, went away with a silent look of disdain. I easily guessed her sentiments, and my pride took the resolution of entertaining the ...Read More

CHAPTER XX I am assaulted and dangerously wounded—suspect O’Donnell, and am confirmed in my opinion—concert a scheme of revenge, put it into execution—O’Donnell robs his own servant and disappears—make my addresses to a lady, and am miraculously delivered from her snare One night, at about twelve o’clock, as I returned from visiting a patient at Chelsea, I received a blow on my head from an unseen hand, that stretched me senseless on the ground; and was left for dead with three stabs of a sword in my body. The groans I uttered when I recovered the use of my ...Read More

CHAPTER XXI Squire Gawky comes to lodge with my master—is involved in a troublesome affair, out of which he extricated by me—he marries my master’s daughter—they conspire against me—I am found guilty of theft, discharged—deserted by my friends, I hire a room in St. Gile’s—where, by accident, I find the lady to whom I paid my addresses in a miserable condition—I relieve her When I enjoyed myself at large in this temper of mind, Lavement let his first floor to my countryman and acquaintance, Squire Gawky, who by this time had got a lieutenancy in the army, and such ...Read More

CHAPTER XXII The History of Miss Williams ‘My father was an eminent merchant in the city who having, in course of trade, suffered very considerable losses, retired in his old age with his wife to a small estate in the country, which he had purchased with the remains of his fortune. At that time, I being but eight years of age, was left in town for the convenience of education, boarded with an aunt, who was a rigid presbyterian, and confined me so closely to what she called the duties of religion, that in time I grew weary of ...Read More

CHAPTER XXIII Miss Williams interrupted by a bailiff, who carries her to the Marshalsea—I accompany her—prove she is not person named in the writ—the bailiff is fain to discharge her—we shift our lodging—her story, and my reflections thereupon—progress of a common woman of the town—resolves to quit that way of life Her story was here interrupted by a rap at the door, which I no sooner opened, than three or four terrible fellows rushed in, one of whom accosted my fellow-lodger thus: “Madam, your servant—you must do me the favour to come along with me, I have a writ ...Read More

CHAPTER XXIV I am reduced to a great misery—assaulted on Tower Hill by a press-gang, who put me on a tender—my usage there—my arrival on board at a man-of-war, where I am put in irons, and released by the good offices of Mr. Thompson, who recommends me as assistant to the surgeon—-he relates his own story—characters of the captain, surgeon, and first mate I applauded the resolution of Miss Williams, who a few days after, was hired in quality of bar-keeper, by one of the ladies who had witnessed in her behalf at the Marshalsea, and who since that ...Read More

CHAPTER XXV The behaviour of Mr. Morgan—his pride, displeasure, and generosity—the economy of our mess described—Thomson’s further friendship—the nature my duty explained—the situation of the sick While he was thus discoursing to me, we heard a voice on the cockpit ladder pronounce with great vehemence, in a strange dialect, “The devil and his dam blow me from the top of Monchdenny, if I go to him before there is something in my pelly. Let his nose be as yellow as saffron, or as plue as a pell (look you), or as green as a leek, ’tis all one.” To ...Read More

CHAPTER XXVI A disagreeable accident happens to me in the discharge of my office—Morgan’s nose is offended—a dialogue between and the Ship’s steward—upon examination, I find more causes of complaint than one—my hair is cut off—Morgan’s cookery—the manner of sleeping on board—I am waked in the night by a dreadful noise Could not comprehend how it was possible for the attendants to come near those who hung on the inside towards the sides of the ship, in order to assist them, as they seemed barricadoed by those who lay on the outside, and entirely out of the reach of ...Read More

CHAPTER XXVII I acquire the friendship of the Surgeon, who procures a warrant for me, and makes me a of clothes—a battle between a Midshipman and me—the Surgeon leaves the ship—the Captain comes on board with another Surgeon—a dialogue between the Captain and Morgan—the sick are ordered to be brought upon the Quarter-deck and examined—the consequences of that order—a Madman accuses Morgan, and is set at liberty by command of the Captain, whom he instantly attacks, and pummels without mercy While I was busied with my friend in the practice. The doctor chanced to pass by the place where ...Read More

CHAPTER XXVIII The Captain enraged, threatens to put the Madman to death with his own hand—is diverted from that by the arguments and persuasion of the first Lieutenant and Surgeon—we set sail for St. Helen’s, join the fleet under the command of Sir C— O—gle, and proceed for the West Indies—are overtaken by a terrible tempest—my friend Jack Rattlin has his leg broke by a fall from the mainyard—the behaviour of Mr. Mackshane—Jack opposes the amputation of his limb, in which he is seconded by Morgan and me, we undertake the cure and perform it successfully The captain was ...Read More

CHAPTER XXIX Mackshane’s malice—I am taken up and imprisoned for a spy—Morgan meets with the same fate—Thompson is tampered to turn evidence against us—disdains the proposal, and is maltreated for his integrity—Morgan is released to assist the Surgeon during an engagement with some French ships-of-war—I remain fettered on the poop, exposed to the enemy’s shot, and grow delirious with fear—am comforted after the battle by Morgan, who speaks freely of the captain, is overheard by the sentinel, who informs against him, and again imprisoned—Thompson grows desperate, and, notwithstanding the remonstrances of Morgan and me, goes overboard in the night ...Read More

CHAPTER XXX We lament the fate of our companion—the Captain offers Morgan his liberty, which he refuses to accept—we brought before him and examined—Morgan is sent back into custody, whither also I am remanded after a curious trial The news of this event affected my fellow prisoner and me extremely, as our unfortunate companion had justly acquired by his amiable disposition the love and esteem of us both; and the more we regretted his untimely fate, the greater horror we conceived for the villain who was undoubtedly the occasion of it. This abandoned miscreant did not discover the least ...Read More

CHAPTER XXXI I discover a subornation against me, by means of a quarrel between two of the evidences; in of which I am set at liberty, and prevail upon Morgan to accept of his freedom on the same terms—Mackshane’s malice—we arrive at Jamaica, from whence in a short time we beat up to Hispaniola, in conjunction with the West India squadron—we take in water, sail again, and arrive at Carthagena—Reflections on our conduct there Meanwhile, a quarrel happening between the two modern Greeks, the one, to be revenged of the other, came and discovered to us the mystery of ...Read More

CHAPTER XXXII Our Land Forces being disembarked, erect a fascine battery—our ship is ordered, with four more, to batter port of Bocca Chica—Mackshane’s cowardice—the Chaplain’s frenzy—honest Rattlin loses one hand—his heroism and reflections on the battle—Crampley’s behaviour to me during the heat of the Fight Our forces being landed and stationed as I have already mentioned, set about erecting a fascine battery to cannonade the principal fort of the enemy; and in something more than three weeks, it was ready to open. That we might do the Spaniards as much honour as possible, it was determined, in a council ...Read More

CHAPTER XXXIII A breach being made in the walls, our soldiers give the assault, and take the place without sailors at the same time, become masters of all the other strengths near Bocca Chica, and take possession of the harbour—the good consequence of this success—we move nearer the town—find two forts deserted, and the Channel blocked up with sunk vessels; which however we find means to clear—land our soldiers at La Quinta—repulse a body of militia—attack the castle of St. Lazar, and are forced to retreat with great loss—the remains of our army are re-embarked—an effort of the Admiral ...Read More

CHAPTER XXXIV An epidemic Fever rages among us—we abandon our Conquests—I am seized with Distemper—write a Petition to the which is rejected—I am in danger of Suffocation through the Malice of Crampley, and relieved by a Serjeant—my Fever increases—the Chaplain wants to confess me—I obtain a favourable Crisis—Morgan’s Affection for me proved—the Behaviour of Mackshane and Crampley towards me—Captain Oakum is removed into another Ship with his beloved Doctor—our new Captain described—An Adventure of Morgan The change of the atmosphere, occasioned by this phenomenon, conspired, with the stench that surrounded us, the heat of the climate, our own constitutions, ...Read More

CHAPTER XXXV Captain Whiffle sends for me—his situation described—his surgeon arrives, prescribes for him, and puts him to bed—a is put up for Mr. Simper contiguous to the state room, which, with other parts of the captains behaviour, gives the ship’s company a very unfavourable idea of their commander—I am detained in the West Indies by the admiral, and go on board of the Lizard sloop of war in quality of surgeon’s mate, where I make myself known to the surgeon, who treats me very kindly—I go on shore, sell my ticket, purchase necessaries, and, at my return on ...Read More

CHAPTER XXXVI A strange adventure—in consequence of which I am extremely happy—Crampley does me in offices with the Captain; his malice is defeated by the good-nature and friendship of the surgeon—we return to Port Royal—our Captain gets the command of a larger ship, and is succeeded by an old man—Brayl is provided for—we receive orders to sail for England When my patients were all in a fair way, my companion and commander, whose name was Brayl, carried me up the country to the house of a rich planter, with whom he was acquainted, where we were sumptuously entertained, and ...Read More

CHAPTER XXXVII We depart for Europe—a misunderstanding arises between the Captain and the Surgeon, through the scandalous aspersions of Captain dies—Crampley tyrannises over the surgeon, who falls a Victim for his Cruelty—I am also ill-used—the Ship strikes—the behaviour of Crampley and the Seamen on that occasion—-I get on shore, challenge the Captain to single combat—am treacherously knocked down, wounded, and robbed Now that I could return to my native country in a creditable way, I felt excessive pleasure in finding myself out of sight of that fatal island, which has been the grave of so many Europeans: and, as ...Read More

CHAPTER XXXVIII I get up and crawl into a barn, where I am in danger of perishing, through the of the country people—their inhumanity—I am succoured by a reputed witch—her story—her advice—she recommends me as a valet to a single lady, whose character she explains But as I lay ruminating, my passion insensibly abated; I considered my situation in quite another light, from that in which it appeared to me at first, and the result of my deliberation was to rise if I could, and crawl to the next inhabited place for assistance. With some difficulty I got upon ...Read More

CHAPTER XXXIX My Reception by that Lady—I become enamoured of Narcissa—recount the particulars of my last misfortune—acquire the good of my Mistress—an Account of the young Squire—I am made acquainted with more particulars of Narcissa’s Situation—conceive a mortal hatred against Sir Timothy—examine my Lady’s library and performances—her extravagant behaviour Fraught with these useful instructions, I repaired to the place of her habitation, and was introduced by the waiting-woman to the presence of my lady, who had not before seen me. She sat in her study, with one foot on the ground, and the other upon a high stool at ...Read More

CHAPTER XL My mistress is surprised at my learning—communicates her performances to me—I impart some of mine to her—am at her faint praise—Narcissa approves of my conduct—I gain an involuntary conquest over the cookwench and dairymaid—their mutual resentment and insinuations—the jealousy of their lovers During this season of love and tranquillity, my muse, which had lain dormant so long, awoke, and produced several small performances on the subject of my flame. But as it concerned me nearly to remain undiscovered in my character and sentiments, I was under a necessity of mortifying my desire of praise, by confining my ...Read More

CHAPTER XLI Narcissa being in danger from the brutality of Sir Timothy, is rescued by me, who revenge myself my rival—I declare my passion, and retreat to the seaside—am surrounded by smugglers, and carried to Boulogne—find my Uncle Lieutenant Bowling in great distress, and relieve him—our conversation At certain intervals my ambition would revive; I would despise myself for my tame resignation to my sordid fate, and revolve a hundred schemes for assuming the character of a gentleman, to which I thought myself entitled by birth and education. In these fruitless suggestions time stole away unperceived, and I had ...Read More

CHAPTER XLII He takes his passage in a cutter for Deal—we are accosted by a Priest, who proves to a Scotchman—his profession on friendship—he is affronted by the Lieutenant, who afterwards appeases him by submission—my uncle embarks—I am introduced by a Priest to a Capuchin, in whose company I set out for Paris—the character of my fellow traveller—on adventure on the road—I am shocked at his behaviour When our repast was ended, we walked down to the harbour, where we found a cutter that was to sail for Deal in the evening, and Mr. Bowling agreed for his passage. ...Read More

CHAPTER XLIII We lodge at a House near Amiens, where I am robbed by the Capuchin, who escapes while am asleep—I go to Noyons in search of him, but without Success—make my Condition known to several People, but find no Relief—grow desperate—find a Company of Soldiers—Enlist in the Regiment of Picardy—we are ordered into Germany—I find the Fatigues of the March almost intolerable—Quarrel with my Comrade in a dispute about Politics—he challenges me to the Field—wounds and disarms me The third night of our pilgrimage we passed at a house near Amiens, where being unknown, we supped upon indifferent ...Read More

CHAPTER XLIV In order to be revenged, I learn the Science of Defence—we join Mareschal Duc de Noailles, are with the Allies of Dettingen, and put to flight—the behaviour of the French soldiers on that occasion—I industriously seek another combat with the old Gascon, and vanquish him in my turn—our regiment is put into Winter Quarters at Rheims, where I find my friend Strap—our Recognition—he supplies me with Money, and procures my Discharge—we take a trip to Paris; from whence, by the way of Flanders, we set out for London; where we safely arrive He was disconcerted at this ...Read More

CHAPTER XLV I inquire for my Uncle, and understand he is gone to sea—take Lodgings at Charing Cross—go to Play, where I meet with an adventure—Dine at an ordinary—the Guests described—become acquainted with Medlar and Doctor Wagtail As soon as we alighted at the inn, I dispatched Strap to inquire for my uncle at the Union Flag in Wapping; and he returned in a little time, with an account of Mr. Bowling’s having gone to sea, mate of a merchant ship, after a long and unsuccessful application attendance at the Admiralty; where, it seems, the interest he depended upon ...Read More

CHAPTER XLVI Wagtail introduces me to a set of fine Gentlemen with whom I spend the Evening at a Conversation—the Characters of my new Companions—the Doctor is roasted—our Issue of our Debauch I accepted his offer with pleasure, and we went thither in a hackney coach where I saw a great number of gay figures fluttering about, most of whom spoke to the doctor with great familiarity. Among the rest stood a group of them round the fire whom I immediately knew to be the very persons who had the night before, by their laughing, alarmed my suspicion of ...Read More

CHAPTER XLVII Strap communicates to me a conquest he had made of a Chandler’s Widow—finds himself miserably mistaken—I go the Opera—admire Melinda—am cautioned by Banter—go to the Assembly at Hampstead—dance with that young lady—receive an insolent message from Bragwell, whose mettle is soon cooled—am in favour with my Mistress, whom I visit next day, and am bubbled out of eighteen guineas at cards—Strap triumphs at my success, but is astonished at my expense—Banter comes to my lodging, is very sarcastic at my expense, and borrows five guineas from me, as a proof of his friendship In the morning, before ...Read More

CHAPTER XLVIII We repair to the coffee-house, where we overhear a curious dispute between Wagtail and Medlar, which is to our decision—the Doctor gives an account of his experiment—Medlar is roasted by Banter at the ordinary—the old gentleman’s advice to me Being as willing to drop the theme as he was to propose it, I accompanied him thither, where we found Mr. Medlar and Dr. Wagtail disputing upon the word Custard, which the physician affirmed should be spelt with a G, observing that it was derived from the Latin verb gustare, “to taste;” but Medlar pleaded custom in behalf ...Read More

CHAPTER XLIX I receive a Challenge—the Consequence of it—the Quarrel being made up, am put in Arrest by the and Affection of Strap—but immediately released upon explaining my Affair—the Behaviour of Mr. Oregan and his two Friends—I visit Melinda, whom I divert with an account of the Duel—propose Marriage—she refers the Matter to her Mother, of whom I make a solemn Demand of her Daughter—the old Lady’s behaviour—I am discarded—-resent their Disdain When I was ready to go abroad next day, Strap brought me a letter, To Mr. Random, Esq., these; which, upon opening, I found contained a challenge ...Read More

CHAPTER L I long to be revenged on Melinda—apply to Banter for his Assistance—he contrives a scheme for that is put in Execution with great Success—I make an Attempt upon the Heart of Miss Gripewell, but am disappointed—grow melancholy at my Disappointment, and have recourse to the Bottle—receive a Billet-doux—am ravished with the Contents—find myself involved in Intrigue, which I imagined would make my Fortune—am confounded at my mistake, which banishes all Thoughts of Matrimony In the meantime, my attention was wholly engrossed in search of another mistress, and the desire of being revenged on Melinda, in both which ...Read More

CHAPTER LI I cultivate an Acquaintance with two Noblemen—am introduced to earl Strutwell—his kind Promise and Invitation—the Behaviour of Porter and Lacquey—he receives me with an Appearance of uncommon Affection—undertakes to speak in my Behalf to the Minister—informs me of his Success, and wishes me Joy—introduces a Conversation about Petronius Arbiter—falls in Love with my Watch, which I press upon him—I make a present of a Diamond Ring to Lord Straddle—impart my good Fortune to Strap and Banter, who disabuses me, to my utter Mortification Baffled hitherto in my matrimonial schemes, I began to question my talents for the ...Read More

CHAPTER LII I attempt to recover my Watch and Jewel, but to no Purpose—resolve to revenge myself on Strutwell my Importunity—am reduced to my last Guinea—obliged to inform Strap of my Necessity, who is almost distracted with the News, but nevertheless obliged to pawn my best Sword for present Subsistence—that small Supply being exhausted, I am almost stupified with my Misfortunes—go to the Gaming Table by the Advice of Banter, and come off with unexpected Success—Strap’s Ecstacy—Mrs. Gawky waits upon me, professes Remorse for her Perfidy, and implores my Assistance—I do myself a Piece of Justice by her Means, ...Read More

CHAPTER LIII I purchase new Clothes—reprimand Strutwell and Straddle—Banter proposes another matrimonial Scheme—I accept of his Terms—set out to in the Stage-coach with the young Lady and her Mother—the Behaviour of an Officer and Lawyer—our fellow Travellers described—a smart dialogue between my Mistress and the Captain Having finished this affair to my satisfaction, I found myself perfectly at ease; and, looking upon the gaming-table as a certain resource for a gentleman in want, became more gay than ever. Although my clothes were almost as good as new, I grew ashamed of wearing them, because I thought everybody by this ...Read More

CHAPTER LIV Day breaking, I have the Pleasure of viewing the Person of Miss Snapper, whom I had not before—the Soldier is witty upon me—is offended—talks much of his Valour—is reprimanded by a grave Gentlewoman—we are alarmed by the cry of Highwaymen—I get out of the Coach, and stand in my own defence—they ride off without having attacked us—I pursue them—one of them is thrown from his Horse and taken—I return to the Coach—am complimented by Miss Snapper—the Captain’s Behaviour on this Occasion—the Prude reproaches me in a Soliloquy—I upbraid her in the same Manner—the Behaviour of Miss Snapper, ...Read More

CHAPTER LV I resolve to ingratiate myself with the Mother, and am favoured by accident—the Precise Lady finds her and quit the Coach—the Captain is disappointed of his dinner—we arrive at Bath—I accompany Miss Snapper to the Long-room, where she is attacked by beau Nash, and, turns the Laugh against him—I make love to her, and receive a check—Squire her to an Assembly, where I am blessed with a Sight of my dear Narcissa, which discomposes me so much, that Miss Snapper, observing my disorder, is at pains to discover the Cause—is piqued at the Occasion, and, in our ...Read More

CHAPTER LVI I become acquainted with Narcissa’s brother, who invites me to his House, where I am introduced to adorable Creature—after dinner, the Squire retires to take his nap—Freeman, guessing the Situation of my Thought, withdraws likewise, on pretence of Business—I declare my passion for Narcissa—am well-received—charmed with her Conversation—the Squire detains us to Supper—I elude his design by a Stratagem, and get home sober In the afternoon, I drank tea at the house of Mr. Freeman, to whom I had been recommended by Banter; where I had not sat five minutes, till the foxhunter came in, and by ...Read More

CHAPTER LVII Miss Williams informs me of Narcissa’s Approbation of my Flame—I appease the Squire—write to my Mistress—am blessed an Answer—beg Leave of her Brother to dance with her at a Ball—obtain his Consent and hers—enjoy a private Conversation with her—am perplexed with Reflections—have the Honour of appearing her Partner at a Ball—we are complimented by a certain Nobleman—he discovers some Symptoms of a Passion for Narcissa—I am stung with Jealousy—Narcissa, alarmed, retires—I observe Melinda in the company—the Squire is captivated by her Beauty I was met next morning at the usual place by Miss Williams, who gave me ...Read More

CHAPTER LVIII Tortured with Jealousy, I go Home, and abuse Strap—receive a Message from Narcissa, in Consequence of which hasten to her Apartment, where her endearing Assurances banish all my Doubts and Apprehensions—in my Retreat discover Somebody in the Dark, whom, suspecting to be a Spy, I resolve to kill, but, to my great Surprise, am convinced of his being no other than Strap—Melinda slanders me—I become acquainted with Lord Quiverwit, who endeavours to sound me with regard to Narcissa—the Squire is introduced to his Lordship, and grows cold towards me—I learn from my Confidante, that this Nobleman professes ...Read More

CHAPTER LIX I receive an extraordinary Message at the Door of the Long Room, which, however, enter, and affront Squire, who threatens to take the Law of me—Rebuke Melinda for her Malice—she weeps with Vexation—Lord Quiverwit is severe upon me—I retort his Sarcasm—am received with the utmost Tenderness by Narcissa, who desires to hear the Story of my Life—we vow eternal Constancy to other—I retire—am waked by a Messenger, who brings a Challenge from Quiverwit, whom I meet, engage, and vanquish I thanked him for his advice, which, however, my pride and resentment would not permit me to follow; ...Read More

CHAPTER LX I am visited by Freeman, with whom I appear in Public, and am caressed—am sent for by Quiverwit, whose Presence I quit flung—Narcissa is carried off by her Brother—I intend to pursue him, and am dissuaded by my Friend—engage in Play, and lose all my Money—set out for London—try my Fortune at the Gaming Table without success—receive a letter from Narcissa—bilk my Tailor While I entertained myself with these reflections, the news of the duel, being communicated by some unknown channel, spread all over the town. I was visited by Freeman, who testified his surprise at finding ...Read More

CHAPTER LXI I am arrested—carried to the Marshalsea—find my old Acquaintance beau Jackson in that Jail—he informs me of Adventures—Strap arrives, and with difficulty is comforted—Jackson introduces me to a Poet—I admire his Conversation and Capacity—am deeply affected with my Misfortune—Strap hires himself as a Journeyman Barber But this expedient was in a few weeks followed with a consequence I did not foresee. A player, having purchased one of the suits that were exposed to sale, appeared in it on the stage one night, while my tailor unfortunately happened to be present. He knew it immediately, and, inquiring minutely ...Read More

CHAPTER LXII I read Melopoyn’s Tragedy, and conceive a vast Opinion of his Genius—he recounts his Adventures While we our breakfast together, I made him acquainted with the character and condition of the poet, who came in with his play at that instant, and, imagining we were engaged about business, could not be prevailed upon to sit; but, leaving his performance, went away. My friend’s tender heart was melted at the sight of a gentleman and Christian (for he had a great veneration for both these epithets) in such misery; and assented with great cheerfulness to a proposal I ...Read More

CHAPTER LXIII The Continuation and Conclusion of Mr. Melopoyn’s Story ‘I made shift, notwithstanding, to maintain myself till the of next winter, when I renewed my addresses to my friend Mr. Supple, and was most graciously received. “I have been thinking of your affair, Mr. Melopoyn,” said he, “and am determined to show how far I have your interest at heart, by introducing you to a young nobleman of my acquaintance, who is remarkable for his fine taste in dramatic writings, and is besides a man of such influence that, if once he should approve of your play, his ...Read More

CHAPTER LXIV I am seized with a deep Melancholy, and become a Sloven—am relieved by my Uncle—he prevails upon to engage with his Owners, as a Surgeon of the Ship which he commands—he makes me a considerable Present—entertain Strap as his steward—I take leave of my Friends, and go on Board—the Ship arrives in the Downs I shall not make any reflection on this story, in the course of which the reader must perceive how egregiously the simplicity and milky disposition of this worthy man had been duped and abused by a set of scoundrels, who were so habituated ...Read More

CHAPTER LXV I set out for Sussex—consult Mrs. Sagely—achieve an Interview with Narcissa—return to the Ship—we get clear of Channel—I learn our Destination—we are chased by a large Ship—the company are dismayed, and encouraged by the Captain’s speech—our pursuer happens to be an English Man of War—we arrive at the Coast of Guinea, purchase four hundred Negroes—sail for Paraguay, get safe into the River of Plate, and sell our Cargo to great Advantage It was now I put in execution the scheme I had projected at London; and asking leave of the captain for Strap and me to stay ...Read More

CHAPTER LXVI I am invited to the Villa of a Spanish Don, where we went with an English Gentleman, make a very interesting discovery—we leave Buenos Ayres, and arrive at Jamaica Our ship being freed from the disagreeable lading of negroes, to whom, indeed, I had been a miserable slave since our leaving the coast of Guinea, I began to enjoy myself, and breathe with pleasure the pure air of Paraguay, this part of which is reckoned the Montpelier of South America, and has obtained, on account of its climate, the name of Buenos Ayres. It was in this ...Read More

CHAPTER LXVII I visit my old Friend Thompson—we set sail for Europe—meet with an odd Adventure—arrive in England—I ride the Country from Portsmouth to Sussex—converse with Mrs. Sagely, who informs me of Narcissa’s being in London—in consequence of this Intelligence, I proceed to Canterbury—meet with my old friend Morgan—arrive in London—visit Narcissa—introduce my Father to be—he is charmed with her good sense and beauty—we come to a Determination of demanding her Brother’s Consent to our Marriage I inquired, as soon as I got ashore, about my generous companion, Mr. Thompson, and hearing that he lived in a flourishing condition ...Read More

CHAPTER LXVIII My Father makes a present to Narcissa—the Letter is dispatched to her Brother—I appear among my Acquaintance—Banter’s Squire refuses his Consent—my Uncle comes to Town—approves of my Choice—I am married—we meet the Squire and his Lady at the Play—our Acquaintance is courted After having spent the evening to the satisfaction of all present, my father addressed himself thus to Narcissa. “Madam, give me leave to consider you hereafter as my daughter, in which capacity I insist upon your accepting this first instance of my paternal duty and affection.” With these words he put into her hand a ...Read More

CHAPTER LXIX My father intends to revisit the Place of his Nativity—we propose to accompany him—my Uncle renews his in my favour, determining to go to sea again—we set out for Scotland—arrive at Edinburgh—purchase our paternal Estate—proceed to it—halt at the Town where I was educated—take up my bond to Crab—the Behaviour of Potion and his Wife, and one of our Female Cousins—our Reception at the Estate—Strap marries Miss Williams, and is settled by my Father to his own satisfaction—I am more and more happy. My father intending to revisit his native country, and pay the tribute of a ...Read More